


Sure Thing

by aprilrcho



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-06
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2020-10-11 00:38:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 20,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20537294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aprilrcho/pseuds/aprilrcho
Summary: Jennie likes soft, cute things. Lisa is a soft, cute thing.Starts during Blackpink House and loosely follows real-life events and timelines. POV changes with each chapter.





	1. It Begins

Lisa followed her groupmates into the apartment, buzzing. As Rose and Jisoo inspected a camera aimed at the doorway, Lisa saw Jennie hesitate at the door.

“Why aren’t you going in?” she teased, moving to hug the older girl from behind.

“I don’t want to,” Jennie sighed, and Lisa gave her a nudge toward the door. The cameras didn’t bother her so much, but she understood Jennie’s apprehension. For the past two years, they had always been under constant scrutiny, but this was constant surveillance. With eager eyes on them at all times, they could never fully relax.

“I wonder how many there are?” Rose said, turning away from the camera.

“Do we really just go in?” Lisa wondered, pushing open the door and stepping inside. She took a full lap of the apartment, picking up Kuma on her way, before finding her way to her own room. The dormitory was virtually unchanged, but it felt different, somehow sinister. She scanned the room for her camera, finding it in a corner of the ceiling. She waved dramatically at the lens, then joined the others to locate the rest of the cameras in the apartment. In total, they found nine cameras and virtually no blind spots.

Settling back into her own room, Lisa could hear Rose putting on a full show for her camera. Unlike Jennie, Rose never seemed to need a break from the spotlight. Lisa flopped down on her bed and stared at the ceiling for a moment, adjusting to this new situation. After years of hard work, this was their vacation with strings. In exchange for partial freedom from a unrelenting practice and tour schedule, the girls gave up their privacy for three months.

Lisa closed her eyes, listening to Rose sing through the wall. “It’ll be fun,” she said to herself quietly, then reached for the light switch above the bed.


	2. Rabbit Sheets

A few hours after moving into the house, Jennie found herself trapped under Lisa’s long body in their shared room. She was fiercely conscious of the camera in her hand – in addition to the one already monitoring the room – as Lisa laughed into her collarbone, but she couldn’t help but smile at the younger girl’s antics.

“It’s already started,” she narrated to the camera, struggling to push Lisa off. She was so easily amused, and Jennie both envied and adored her for it. Lisa finally rolled off to Jennie’s side, nestling her head into the crook of Jennie’s shoulder. She reached up and plucked the camera from Jennie’s hand, holding it outstretched above them. Jennie relaxed into Lisa and sighed, exhausted from the day’s task list.

“Do you think our fans will enjoy this?” she wondered aloud.

“Of course,” Lisa responded, her eyes flicking up to meet Jennie’s. Always glass half-full, Jennie thought, smiling faintly and resting her head against Lisa’s. “I’m suddenly really happy to be here with you,” Lisa added, a few moments later. Caught by surprise, Jennie couldn’t suppress the smile that spread across her face, her eyes still on their reflection in the camera screen. Lisa was so expressive with her affection, and as an unexpected warmth bloomed in her chest, Jennie felt suddenly shy in the spotlight.

“I think it’s time for bed,” she murmured, nudging the younger girl gently. The pair wished the camera goodnight, then set it down for the day. Finally free from the camera’s gaze, Jennie felt her shoulders loosen.

“Wash-up time,” Lisa squeaked and hoisted herself up, but not without giving Jennie a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. Jennie felt suddenly chilly, bereft of the warmth of Lisa’s body. She slid under the covers on her bed and watched Lisa pad to the bathroom, her slippered feet making muffled sounds on the carpet.

Jennie glanced over at Lisa’s rabbit sheets, which she actually didn’t hate, and the image of Lisa crawling into the sheets along with the duvet popped into her mind. It had been somehow both so surprising and so Lisa, and Jennie felt the corners of her mouth twitch up into a half-smile. Their little _maknae_, showing her age. Jennie felt a surge of protectiveness toward the younger girl, wanting to preserve that playfulness.

When Lisa joined the company as a trainee, Jennie didn’t give her a second glance. Lanky, awkward, quiet, and Thai, Lisa was so clearly out of place among the polished Korean recruits. It wasn’t until a few weeks later, when Jennie arrived early to dance practice and caught the end of the previous session, that Jennie finally noticed Lisa. How could she not? Lisa was liquid gold, flowing between steps with inhuman grace. Precise, confident, and effortless, Lisa belonged onstage. Gone was any trace of the shy outsider, and Jennie found herself approaching the younger girl as she slumped against a wall drinking water, alone, after Lisa’s practice ended.

Nearly six years later, Jennie still caught glimpses of that timid fourteen-year old, buried deep below Lisa’s carefree exterior: when Lisa fumbled with her fingers when she was nervous, when the tips of her ears turned pink after missing a high note, when she returned from phone calls to Thailand with shimmering eyes. Never failing to find silver linings, Lisa was the strongest person Jennie had ever met. Even still, Jennie couldn’t help but want to shelter her, to shield her from the lightning hidden in the clouds.

Later that night, after Lisa had traipsed back in, crawled into bed, flicked out the lights, and bid Jennie a sleepy goodnight, Jennie fell asleep with her skin tingling where Lisa had grasped her shoulder with warm fingers.


	3. Best Friend

Jisoo wasn’t certain how she and Jennie got stuck cooking while the children got to decorate the tree. The division of labor struck her as unfair, but she soldiered on, slivering radishes diligently. She found herself warming up to the activity, enjoying the single-minded repetition involved in her vegetable preparations.

“I found something I'm good at!” Jisoo exclaimed, self-satisfied. “I’m an expert.” Jennie laughed, humoring her, and continued on with her own duties as Jisoo monologued about her newfound talent. Jennie’s role seemed more involved and complex, but she was the self-proclaimed chef of their little household after all, and Jisoo was grateful for her apparent enthusiasm. As Jennie conversed animatedly with the instructor, though Jisoo detected traces of her camera voice slipping through. The chef was, after all, incredibly boring.

A sudden chorus of excited squeals drew both older girls’ attention away from their cooking and to the doorframe, where Rose and Lisa sat looking out into the courtyard. In her excitement, Rose had fisted the back of Lisa’s sweater in her hand, pulling the younger girl towards herself. Jisoo turned to Jennie, a comment about simple pleasures for simple people ready on her lips, but Jennie had already turned away from the scene, busying herself with the bao preparations.

Jisoo studied the concentration in Jennie’s face as she sliced the chicken breast, wholly invested in the activity. Jisoo glanced back up to the younger girls, who had fully exited the house in pursuit of the kittens, then back at Jennie.

Jennie was Jisoo’s best friend. Aside from her sister, Jisoo was fairly certain no one knew as much about her as Jennie. Of course, she loved Rose and Lisa, but as the older of the four girls, Jisoo and Jennie shared a sense of responsibility for their group and the younger girls. Whispered confessions of secret fears and doubts bound them, and Jisoo often found herself seeking advice from or comfort in Jennie. With the younger girls, Jisoo sometimes felt that she needed to slip into the big-sister role. With Jennie, she could relax.

Jennie was Jisoo’s best friend, and lately, Jennie had been acting differently. Shying away from affection, suddenly going quiet, acting distant – the changes were subtle, but Jisoo had known Jennie for years. Jisoo couldn’t pinpoint the reason behind the shift in behavior, but she was starting to pick up on a pattern.

Realizing she had fallen behind on her radishes, Jisoo shook herself from her thoughts and returned to the task at hand. The sandwich-making picked up from there, and the production-line style work kept her mind from straying again. Spread, assemble, repeat. The younger girls had returned inside and been put to work adorning a floral arch (although a cursory glance from Jisoo confirmed that Rose seemed to be carrying the arch-building team), and the afternoon passed in a blur of repetition.

Once the food prep had been completed, the tree had been decorated, and the house had been cleaned, the girls flopped onto the couch to perform their first livestream inside their new home. Jisoo actually really enjoyed livestreams – it was an opportunity to show fans a relatively unfiltered version of their personalities and lives, to connect with the people who made their success possible. Especially here in the house, where they were constantly being filmed regardless, the livestream felt like playtime.

Seconds after Jennie switched on the stream, comments from eager fans began pouring in. The thought of all those people, observing them from the other side of phones and computers, never ceased to amaze Jisoo. People from all over the world put their lives on hold to watch four twenty-something girls act like buffoons for an hour. As Jisoo jokingly attempted to stare down the unblinking portrait of Jennie, she found herself hoping the fans felt the stream was worth their time.

Later, on the way to the guerilla fan meeting, Jisoo watched sleet fall through the tinted van windows. She felt as if they were on the brink of something, but she couldn’t tell what. All she knew, as they cruised through the snow toward their rain-spattered, determined fans, was that things were about to change.


	4. Useless, Pretty Things

Rose was at a loss. She had been haphazardly circling the store for twenty minutes, unable to find a suitable present for Jennie. She had found dozens of things Jennie would like, but Jennie had also found those things and had decided to purchase them for herself.

“Kuma, I’m going to buy this for you,” Rose heard Jennie tell the camera for the third time, this time holding some kind of stuffed dog toy. As Jennie added the fuzzy blob to her shopping basket, Rose sighed and stepped out from her hiding place.

“This is harder than I thought,” she narrated to her camera, wandering toward the other end of the giant store. As she rounded a corner, she nearly ran headfirst into Jennie herself, gasping in mock alarm and swiftly turning away. Completely empty handed, Rose had nothing to hide, but she played up the moment for the camera.

“Even if I have to stay here until the store closes, I’ll buy a good gift,” Rose told the cameras determinedly, continuing to peruse the cluttered shelves. She spotted Lisa, brashly interacting with various shop employees, and made her way over to the younger girl.

“What am I going to do?” Lisa asked herself as Rose approached, and Rose laughed at the bemused expression plastered across her face.

“What happened?” she asked, and Lisa turned to her, breaking into an easy smile.

“They don’t have the things I want to buy, but I’ll find something else.” Then her eyes narrowed. “Hey, get away from me; what if I’m your Secret Santa?” Rose’s eyes flicked down to the dorky black sweatshirt bunched up in Lisa’s hands, then back to her furtive expression.

“It’s Jisoo, isn’t it?” Lisa gasped and quickly attempted to stuff the sweatshirt into the folds of her long coat, and Rose rolled her eyes.

“It’s a nice gift – she’ll like it.” Lisa beamed as Rose continued, “I actually need your help. I have Jennie, and I don’t know what to get her.”

Lisa pursed her lips in thought. “Do you have any ideas?”

“Yes, but every time I see something she’d like, she just decides to buy it for herself!” Rose huffed, and Lisa laughed fondly. Turning away from Rose, Lisa quickly scanned the store, eyes flitting between aisles rapidly. Her gaze landed on something a couple aisles down, and her face lit up.

“Oh Chaeng, look at that soft thing!” she squealed, grabbing Rose’s hand and pointing toward a section with various furry items. Abandoning her own gift hunt, Lisa took off toward the fur-covered clothes, dragging Rose along behind her. “Jennie loves soft things,” Lisa told Rose, her eyes glued on a luxe beige coat.

“I’ve noticed,” Rose chuckled, watching Lisa run her fingers down the coat sleeves with an awed expression on her face. “You’re right, this is perfect. I’ll get her this coat and…” her eyes darted around the remaining items, “and this matching bag.” She gathered both items in her arms triumphantly.

“Nice, nice,” Lisa said, turning back to Rose with a broad smile on her face. “Jennie will love it.” Remembering her own shopping quest, Lisa pulled a face. “Now I have to find something equally good for Jisoo.”

“She’ll like the sweatshirt, and I’m sure you’ll find something else. You’re good at this kind of thing,” Rose told the younger girl as she flounced away, and Lisa raised a slender arm and waved in response.

Rose turned toward the cashier and walked two steps before nearly colliding with Jennie, again. Frantically shoving the older girl’s presents into her coat – this time, at least she had something to hide – Rose attempted to smile nonchalantly at Jennie.

“What should I get Lisa?” Jennie asked quickly, eyes flitting about Rose’s face and apparently unaware of or unbothered by the redhead’s hasty gift concealment. Rose furrowed her brow, doing a simple calculation in her head.

“Jisoo is my Secret Santa,” she proclaimed triumphantly. Jennie frowned, her own forehead crinkling.

“How do you know?” Rose shook her head, waving a hand dismissively.

“Don’t think about it. What do I think you should get Lisa?” Rose asked, settling reflexively into English partway through the question.

“Yeah,” Jennie affirmed. Following Rose into English, she continued, “I want to get her something she’ll like.”

Rose laughed, “Yes, that’s the point.”

Jennie just nodded in response, looking away, and Rose took a second to study the older girl’s face. Jennie seemed almost… nervous? There was a slight tension in her forehead, and her eyes wandered the shelves restlessly. She seemed to be taking this very seriously, and Rose stopped to wonder if she herself wasn’t taking the Secret Santa seriously enough.

“So, what would she like?” Jennie asked, shaking Rose from her thoughts.

“Lisa? I heard her shouting about exactly what she wanted earlier,” Rose said, rolling her eyes affectionately. “She wanted some useless pretty things.” She took Jennie by the arm, heading toward the girls’ toys section. The two girls walked in silence for a moment, both caught up in their thoughts.

“I’m glad we still do things like this,” Jennie said quietly, and Rose caught her eye as they walked.

“Me too. This feels kind of weird, doesn’t it? It’s like before, but not quite.” Jennie nodded, glancing at a faraway cameraman.

“I miss it, sometimes.” Jennie admitted, and Rose smiled softly.

“Of course we miss it,” Rose chuckled. “It was so easy. So difficult, but so easy, too.”

At that, Jennie smiled and wrapped her arm around Rose’s. “So what is this useless pretty thing?” As she asked, the pair turned into an aisle cluttered with pink and purple items, most of which were princess-themed.

“We’ve arrived,” Rose announced, returning to Korean. She gestured grandly at the selection, and Jennie let out a small chuckle. Rose turned to her, a hand on her hip. “Can you guess what Lisa wanted?”

Jennie’s eyes flicked about the options. Her gaze rested on various items, but with a small shake of her head, she moved on from each before finally settling on a childish Alice in Wonderland tea set. She pointed without moving, “That one.”

“Wow, how did you know?” Rose asked, honestly surprised. The miscellaneous items were virtually indistinguishable from one another in terms of uselessness and prettiness.

“I’ve heard her talk about wanting to have tea,” Jennie shrugged, reaching for the tea set. Rose frowned slightly. She spent more time with Lisa than anyone else, arguably, and she had never once heard the Thai girl mention tea.

“If you say so,” she shrugged. A silly, flower-topped pen caught Rose’s eye, and she plucked it off the shelf. “She wanted this too.”

“This is totally Lisa’s style,” Jennie murmured, taking the pen from Rose’s hand and setting it on top of the tea set in her basket. Seemingly satisfied, Jennie glanced back up to Rose. Catching sight of the younger girl’s searching gaze, Jennie stiffened slightly.

“I’m going to buy these,” she said, starting to walk toward the cashier. Turning back, she quietly said, “Thanks, Rosie,” in English before walking away from the redhead. Rose watched Jennie walk away for a minute, contemplating the older girl’s odd behavior. Shrugging, Rose moved toward the stairs, planning on using a different checkout counter than her gift recipient. As an afterthought, she picked up another flower-capped pen, adding it to her haul, before finally heading toward the cashier.


	5. Couple Item

The girls gathered around their small, cluttered dining table to open presents. Jennie went first, peering into the bag excitedly.

“What is this?” she asked, holding the very same pen she had gotten for Lisa. She peered suspiciously at Rose, who appeared equally surprised.

“I think it’s a pen,” Rose said, in English, and Jennie narrowed her eyes at her. Rose just smiled back blithely.

“Pretty,” Lisa cooed, and Rose almost laughed out loud at the longing look in her eyes.

Jennie returned her attention to her gift bag, pulling out something fuzzy. Lisa made a strange noise of excitement at the revealed purse, having attempted to switch from a sound of recognition to one of inquisitiveness, and Jisoo startled slightly, taken aback.

While Jennie pulled her final present from her bag, Lisa made eye contact with Rose, who seemed thoroughly pleased by Jennie’s reactions to her gifts, and beamed. Rose rolled her eyes at the younger girl but smiled nonetheless, grateful for Lisa’s help, then rearranged her features into an surprised expression as Jennie modeled her new outfit.

“I also like fur,” Jisoo whined. “I want furry clothes too.” Jennie laughed at Jisoo, pulling her hair out from under the coat. “You look like a human reed,” Jisoo continued, and Lisa elbowed her in the side.

“That looks good on you,” Lisa reassured Jennie, who appeared not to need any reassuring as she pranced around in her new jacket. Lisa continued, “I like this outfit a lot. It’s so pretty.”

“You look like you came that way today,” Jisoo added, and Jennie smiled delightedly.

“I love this,” Jennie announced, looking down at her coat and bag. “Now I have to guess who gave this to me?” Having carefully observed the others’ reactions, she paused to think for less than a second before excitedly guessing, “Nalalisa!”

Lisa laughed and shot a glance at Rose, who looked genuinely surprised, as Jennie continued, “My Secret Santa is Lalisa, definitely.” Lisa just laughed harder, both amused by Jennie’s confidence and somewhat touched that the older girl thought Lisa bought gifts for her.

Hearing Jennie proclaim Lisa’s name with such conviction brought Rose back to her confessional. “Jennie likes soft things, like fur. She really likes cute things too,” she had told the cameras after receiving help from Lisa. Looking back at Lisa’s grinning face and Jennie’s determined brow, Rose wondered when the two had gotten so close. Waving the thought away, Rose returned to feeling pleased that she had not only given Jennie a good gift but also avoided detection as her Secret Santa.

“I love this, it’s such a good game,” Rose pronounced, self-contentedly. Jisoo glanced at Rose’s satisfied expression. Having both seen and heard Lisa buying her own gifts, Jisoo knew Rose had to be Jennie’s Secret Santa, but she was surprised that Jennie chose Lisa so quickly. Given Jennie’s apparent liking of the clothing, Jisoo chalked it up to Lisa’s general knack for gift-giving and returned her attention to the Thai girl in question, who had begun opening her presents next.

Upon opening the lid of the box, Lisa shrieked. “What is it?” Jennie asked, both startled and pleased by the younger girl’s reaction. As Lisa pulled the flower-tipped pen from the box, Jennie realized they had a matching set and excitedly reached for her own pen, caught up in Lisa’s enthusiasm.

“_Daebak_!” Lisa squealed, reaching a long arm across the table to hold her pen next to Jennie’s.

“This is awesome, and we’re a couple,” Jennie said to Lisa, who looked happily down at the pen. She was doubly thrilled by the gift; she already thought it was cute, and now she and Jennie matched. Smiling broadly, Lisa looked back up and locked eyes with Jennie, who quickly glanced away, cheeks rosy.

The girls continued with the gift exchange, and Rose and Jisoo opened their gifts with little ruckus.

Later, after the girls had cleaned up the gift-wrap and said goodnight to the cameramen, Jennie and Lisa lay on the couch, Lisa sprawled across the cushions with her feet in Jennie’s lap.

“Thank you for the tea, _unni_,” Lisa said, nudging Jennie with her foot.

“Chaeng told me you were yelling about it,” Jennie admitted, shrugging Lisa’s gratitude off. Then grasping the younger girl by the ankle, she tugged on a long leg. “Hey, get your feet off me,” she protested in English.

Swinging her legs off of Jennie, Lisa laughed and hauled herself upright.

“Should I lie this way, then?” she teased, as she slid her head down into Jennie’s lap and propped her feet on the armrest. Jennie sighed and moved to roll Lisa onto the floor, but she caught sight of Lisa’s shy smile and knew that she never stood a chance. Instead of pushing Lisa off, Jennie brushed a loose strand of hair behind the Thai girl’s ear and chuckled resignedly.

“You’re too good at that, you know?” she admonished. Lisa had the gall to look perplexed for a moment, her eyes wide and demure, before she broke into a grin and nodded. Gently smacking Lisa’s flat stomach in reproach, Jennie continued sternly, “You can’t just act cute to get what you want all the time.”

“It’s worked so far,” Lisa shot back cheekily, locking eyes with Jennie, who realized her hand was still resting on the younger girl’s waist. Feeling suddenly warm, Jennie quickly retracted her arm and tore her gaze away from Lisa’s.

Noticing the abrupt attitude change, Lisa frowned and studied Jennie. The older girl looked almost nervous, her shoulders stiff, and she seemed to be avoiding Lisa’s gaze. This had been a common occurrence lately, and Lisa would’ve been more hurt by Jennie’s withdrawal if it weren’t for the consolation prize she offered.

“Christmas is my favorite holiday,” Jennie said haltingly, after a moment. She spoke quietly into the silence, picking at the arm of the couch. “When I was younger, living in New Zealand alone, I would get to come home and see my parents for Christmas. I didn’t care so much about presents or anything, but sometimes I was kind of lonely, and the holidays were always so warm and happy.”

Watching a smile flicker across Jennie’s lips, Lisa absorbed this new information about the Korean girl. Lately, Jennie would flinch away from displays of affection, but then, upon seeing Lisa’s hurt eyes, she would always release little bits of information about herself, scraps of memories and secrets. They weren’t much, but Lisa was satisfied by the tradeoff with the typically closed-off older girl. Each time Jennie pulled away, she left Lisa with a new little shard of herself for the younger girl to tuck away. As Lisa patiently, painstakingly collected these pieces, Jennie started to come into focus, complete and vibrant.

For her part, Jennie was just trying to keep it together. Lately, Lisa’s usual innocent touches had been affecting Jennie in unusual ways, and she was pretty sure it was getting worse. Innocuous brushes from the Thai girl’s fingers on Jennie’s skin would leave the older girl flustered; even simple doe-eyed glances made Jennie’s cheeks flush.

Rather than figure out why Lisa’s touch made her so uncomfortable, Jennie opted to create space between the two of them, removing herself from Lisa’s reach whenever possible. Both unable to explain her sudden reticence and powerless against the sad confusion that always followed, Jennie found herself sharing trivial details about her life, small confessions that seemed to placate Lisa.

“We should sleep, right?” Lisa asked after a long stretch, seeing that Jennie didn’t plan to continue speaking. Seemingly startled by Lisa’s voice, Jennie shook herself out of her reverie and glanced down at the girl in her lap.

“Yeah, it’s late,” she said, but made no move to get up. For a moment, the two girls just stared at each other. Then Lisa winked, and Jennie rolled her eyes, ignoring the jolt that flickered down her spine, as she shoved the younger girl off of her lap.

Lisa laughed, falling to the ground dramatically. Hauling herself up, she pressed a quick kiss to Jennie’s cheek before heading toward their shared room. Alone, Jennie sat on the couch for a moment longer, fingers resting pensively on a now-flushed cheek.


	6. Chicken Skewers

“If I stay right here, I’ll get caught,” Jennie nervously told the cameramen, as Jisoo watched from above with the younger girls. “I should be over there,” she continued, and Jisoo rolled her eyes.

“If she doesn’t stop talking, she’ll get caught,” she said dryly, and Rose laughed.

“When is she coming? I’m getting nervous,” Rose said, observing Jennie’s awkward behavior. “She’s just washing cups. Continuously.”

Jisoo chuckled, glancing over at Lisa, who had her eyes glued to the screen. The Thai girl’s fingers fidgeted with a small plastic bag in her fingers, and Jisoo patted her knee gently. Catching sight of the contest winner on screen, Jisoo turned away from Lisa, saying, “She’s here.”

Onscreen, Jennie began to fidget nervously, apparently torn between watching the door and trying to shield her identity. “Jennie is just standing there like that,” Jisoo observed to Rose and Lisa, frowning. “Jennie, you need to turn around,” she said into the microphone, wrapped up in the undercover operation.

“She’s so obvious,” Rose laughed quietly, watching Jennie hunch down behind the bar. Jisoo laughed, already resigning herself to inevitable detection by their contest winner. While Rose continued to make hushed observations, Lisa sat silently, her attention still fixed on the screen. The three of them continued that way, monitoring Jennie’s nervous antics, until it was time for Rose to join the older girl.

“As long as Rose doesn’t do anything weird, it should be fine,” Jisoo told Lisa, who finally looked away from the screen and up at Jisoo’s face. She smiled, then looked nervously at the cameras before leaning into Jisoo.

“I wanted to ask you something,” Lisa said quietly. Masking concern, Jisoo nodded and smiled at the cameras placidly before leaning toward Lisa. Lisa glanced over at the screen again, watching Rose clean tables, before asking, “Do you think Jennie has been acting,” she hesitated, “different?”

At that, Jisoo turned to look at Lisa, noticing the worried set of her eyebrows. Jennie had been acting strangely lately, but the change had been so slight that Jisoo hadn’t really expected anyone else to notice. Not to mention, Jennie had always had a soft spot for Lisa, tolerating far more affection from the young Thai girl than from anyone else. Jisoo was surprised to hear that Jennie was even treating Lisa differently, and she began to worry in earnest about the reticent Korean girl.

After mulling this over for a moment, Jisoo opened her mouth to respond, but at the same moment a crewmember signaled to Lisa, who stood up quickly and followed him toward the stairs. Lisa hesitated in the doorway momentarily, casting a glance back at Jisoo, before continuing over the threshold.

Jisoo spent the rest of the candid camera speculating about Jennie, who seemed completely normal, if not a little too engrossed in learning how to be a barista. When they sat down with the contest winner for an interview, Jisoo observed the way Jennie leaned back idly into Lisa, then sat up quickly, and she noticed the way Jennie’s eyes lingered on Lisa’s cover-blowing mouth long after the younger girl had finished making faces for the cameras.

As Jennie ran a hand across Lisa’s back, grasping her shoulder, she glanced up and locked eyes with Jisoo, who had been staring with a raised eyebrow. Eyes darting down to the floor, Jennie pulled her arm back and clasped her hands in her lap.

Jisoo’s eyes narrowed. The shows of affection provoked less suspicion than did the withdrawn, almost guilty behavior that followed. Something was definitely up with Jennie, and, pushing her imaginary Detective Conan glasses up the bridge of her nose, Jisoo vowed to crack the case.

A crewmember waved at Jisoo, drawing her attention from her thoughts, and held up a black box tied with thin, pink ribbon. Catching on after a moment, Jisoo turned to the contest winner and asked,

“Aren’t you curious about your next present?” She resisted the urge to laugh at her own awkward delivery, hoping she sounded sincere. Lisa reached out a long arm, taking the gift and passing it along to their contest winner, who gingerly untied the ribbon and pulled out a picturesque little cake.

At the sight of the dessert, Jisoo felt a sudden pang of hunger, and her mind wandered to chicken skewers. Between preparations for the candid camera, baking the cake, and typically not being allowed to eat much in general, Jisoo hadn’t eaten since the dry handful of cereal she’d managed to grab on her way out the door earlier that day, and she would kill for a hot chicken skewer. She waited dutifully as they wrapped up the interview, invented songs about grilled meat playing in her head.

Jisoo heaved a small sigh of relief when they finally said their goodbyes to their contest winner. As the crew members packed up their equipment, Jisoo spotted Jennie walking toward the door and, seeing an opportunity to kill two chickens with one skewer, she caught up to the younger girl.

“_Jendeukie_, I’m hungry,” she whined, tugging at Jennie’s arm.

“Now who’s clingy?” Jennie teased, and Jisoo pulled a face at the pun.*

“I want to eat chicken skewers,” she insisted, and Jennie laughed, her gums showing.

“Of course you do. I’m sure we can ask someone to get some,” Jennie said, gesturing vaguely toward the busy crew members. Jisoo frowned and shook her head resolutely.

“I want hot chicken skewers.” Determined to see her plan to corner and interrogate Jennie through, Jisoo flagged down their manager to ask permission for a chicken skewer expedition. As she negotiated with the hesitant woman, she could see Jennie looking around the café, eyes settling on Lisa and Rose chatting near the register. Having sweet-talked her way to a reluctant yes from the manager, Jisoo turned back to the younger girl.

“Let’s go,” she said to Jennie, noticing the way her eyes darted away from the younger girls, whose hands rested loosely intertwined between them. Jennie nodded, threading her arm through Jisoo’s as they walked out of the café and into the Hongdae streets, accompanied only by a driver.

“Is everything okay?” Jisoo asked abruptly, breaking the silence that had settled over them for the first two blocks. Jennie startled slightly, and Jisoo winced inwardly. She had never been particularly tactful. “I mean, you seem a little down lately,” she followed, her voice gentle.

“Yeah, I’ve just been tired,” Jennie said, glancing down at the floor. Jisoo’s eyes narrowed at the flimsy answer, but she pressed on.

“Did something happen?” she asked, and Jennie shook her head hastily.

“No, no, it’s nothing.” Jennie reassured Jisoo, who did not feel reassured in the slightest.

“Lisa is worried about you too.”

“She is?” At that, Jennie glanced up to meet Jisoo’s eyes and, likely seeing both Lisa’s and Jisoo’s concern reflected in them, she sighed gently. “Don’t worry _unni_, there’s nothing wrong.”

Jisoo wanted to question Jennie further, but she was interrupted by their arrival at a small street vendor selling chicken skewers. At the smell of freshly cooked meat, Jisoo’s reawakened hunger overrode her concerns for a moment, and her attention was diverted to meticulously stripping four skewers of grilled chicken. The task occupied Jisoo for the entire drive back to the house, during which Jennie simply gazed absentmindedly through the window, occasionally teasing Jisoo about her eating style.

“We’re home,” Jisoo announced loudly as she stepped through the pink doorway, closely followed by Jennie. High pitched squeals drew the older girls to the living room, where they found Rose squirming on the floor, pinned down by Lisa, who sat astride her hips. Lisa’s long fingers skittered up and down Rose’s sides as the redhead attempted to catch the younger girl’s wrists to end the tickling.

The pair were too invested in their tussle to notice the return of the older girls for a moment, long enough for Jisoo to see the way Jennie’s jaw clenched, lip twitching downwards. Then Rose bucked her hips, unbalancing Lisa enough for the older girl to wriggle free and scramble away from her tormentor. Only then did she notice the older girls standing in the living room doorway, mouths slightly ajar.

“You’re back!” she exclaimed breathlessly, and Lisa’s head snapped around to see them.

“I missed you,” she said, bouncing up from the floor to wrap them both in a bear hug.

“Get off, you goblin,” Jisoo protested, but Lisa just squeezed tighter, pressing her cheek against Jisoo’s affectionately. As Jisoo felt Jennie tense up next to her, the last puzzle piece slid into place, and she almost laughed at how obvious it was. Freeing an arm from Lisa’s grip, Jisoo pinched the Thai girl’s ribs, causing her to twist sharply away and release the older girls.

“At least Jennie likes me,” Lisa laughed, threading an arm through Jennie’s as Jisoo stepped away from the long-armed menace.

“Only because you’re so much nicer to Jennie than you are to me,” Rose complained, motioning toward the floor where Lisa had just tickled her mercilessly. Jisoo laughed at the wounded expression on Lisa’s face, and Rose rolled her eyes, but a smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

“I love you Rosie,” Lisa said in English, blowing a kiss to the redhead. Rose swatted it out of the air, breaking into an amused smile as she tossed her hair and headed toward their bedroom door.

“Goodnight to everyone except Lalisa,” Rose said, heading into the room. During this exchange, Jisoo watched Jennie slowly extricate herself from Lisa’s grasp, letting their arms hang a millimeter apart. The younger Korean girl’s face betrayed nothing, but her fingers twitched nervously, as if reaching toward Lisa’s.

“I’m going to bed too,” Jisoo said, following Rose toward their shared room.

“Sleep well,” Lisa chirped. Catching Jisoo’s eye, she glancing to Jennie, then back to Jisoo, a slight crease in her brow. Jisoo just smiled and shook her head subtly, continuing into the bedroom.

As she closed the door behind her, leaving Jennie and Lisa standing in the living room together, Jisoo chuckled to herself. Jennie’s guilty glances, her lingering stares, her nervous withdrawals – it all made sense in the context of Lisa, and Jisoo congratulated herself on solving the case. Lisa had been right earlier, casually pinpointing the precise cause of Jennie’s recent unusual behavior; Jennie certainly did like Lisa.

Jisoo wondered when the stubborn Korean girl would realize.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * 젠득이 (jendeukie) is a play on 찐득 (jjindeuk), which means clingy.


	7. Swimsuit

“We should pack, right?” Jennie asked, and Rose heaved herself upright on the futon. They sat in a semicircle around the coffee table, planning for their upcoming trip to Thailand. Rose wasn’t certain what degree of freedom they would have on this vacation, but she wanted to be prepared in case they were given time to explore.

“Let’s make a list,” Jisoo said, reaching for a pen and the nearest sheet of paper. As she scribbled out the title, three pairs of eyes shifted expectantly to Lisa.

“First, it’s hot, so sunscreen,” she said, and the other three girls nodded in agreement.

“We should bring a lot of sun cream,” Jennie affirmed, and Jisoo underlined the first list item decisively.

“Sunglasses? Sandals?” Jisoo asked while preemptively adding each to the list. Rose just nodded, struggling to think of more travel essentials. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d gone on vacation. On those rare occasions that they were given enough free time to travel outside of Korea, Rose always went home to see her family in Melbourne. Vacations weren’t really a thing for her. The other girls seemed to have a similar block, and they fell silent for a moment, attempting to recall freer, beachier days.

“Swimsuit,” Jennie said suddenly, and Rose looked up at her, nodding.

“Oh, yeah,” Lisa agreed, casting a mischievous glance toward Jennie, who was staring intently at Lisa like a cat would a bowl of milk. Making eye contact with the younger girl, Jennie quickly dropped her gaze to the floor, her face tightening.

Rose saw it all.

“We have to swim, right?” Jennie mused, almost shyly, and Lisa nodded enthusiastically as Jisoo added swim gear to the list. Jennie’s bashful gaze rose back to Lisa’s face, the younger girl’s attention redirected to marveling at Jisoo’s serial-killer-neat handwriting. Rose watched Jennie’s eyes skate across Lisa’s features, flicking from her eyes to her broad grin to her scrunched nose and back to her mouth.

When those cat eyes suddenly darted sideways to meet Rose’s curious stare, Jennie did something peculiar and wholly out of character: she _blushed_. In all her years of knowing, living with, performing with, spending time with Jennie, Rose could count on one hand the number of times she had seen the older girl flush like that. Every time, Jennie had been caught doing something that she knew she shouldn’t. Something like staring hungrily at her youngest bandmate’s expressive lips.

This wasn’t the first time Jennie’s antics around Lisa prompted curiosity, and Rose studied the reticent girl through narrowed eyes. Jennie had been acting weird lately, especially around Lisa. Rose racked her memory for more evidence, trying to figure out where, when, how this odd behavior began, but she could pinpoint no definitive moment when Jennie began treating Lisa differently. It had been gradual, slow and hesitant at first, like learning a language or falling in love.

_Oh_.

Like a lens coming into focus, Rose suddenly understood all of Jennie’s wistful gazes and gentle touches with new depth. Scattered observations, seemingly meaningless in the moment, crystalized into a striking – though not altogether surprising – image: Jennie had feelings for Lisa and had _no clue_ how to deal with them.

“Done,” Jisoo announced, capping the pen and holding her tidy packing list up for the others to see. Lisa unfolded her long body and leapt up from the couch excitedly, grabbing Jennie’s hand and attempting to pull her up in the process.

“Come help me pack,” Lisa whined, reaching for Jennie’s other hand and tugging more insistently. Jennie groaned, leaning further into the couch as Lisa began to pout. Catching sight of Lisa’s jutting bottom lip, Jennie squeezed her eyes shut and turned her head away from the persistent Thai girl. Undeterred, Lisa continued to pull on Jennie’s hands, begging plaintively, until cat eyes met wide, imploring ones. Seeing Lisa’s pitiful expression, Jennie huffed and rolled her eyes, but a smile ghosted across her lips as she allowed the younger girl to haul her upright and drag her to their shared room.

Rose blinked several times. The scope of how she understood Jennie and Lisa’s interactions had shifted, and now Rose couldn’t stop noticing all the little gestures and expressions, signs indicating that something within Jennie had changed. She turned to Jisoo with a raised eyebrow, expecting perplexity, but she found only knowing amusement sparkling in the older girl’s eyes.

“You see it too, right?” Jisoo chuckled, and Rose nodded slowly, still processing this revelation. Jisoo had always been closer to Jennie, so Rose wasn’t too surprised that the often-nosy oldest member was already aware of Jennie’s feelings.

“For how long?” she asked, and Jisoo shrugged, uncapping her pen again to scratch doodles absentmindedly along the border of their packing list.

“I didn’t notice until a couple of weeks ago,” Jisoo admitted, a Dalgom-esque puppy taking shape below her pen. “I don’t think Jennie’s figured it out yet, though,” she continued, adding glasses and a detective cap to her drawing.

“For someone so private, she’s pretty obvious,” Rose mused, and Jisoo snorted in agreement, moving on to a new doodle at the bottom of the page.

Rose knew very little about Jennie’s personal life; the older girl volunteered almost no details about her life prior to becoming a trainee, and prying questions (usually from Jisoo) were always gently deflected. In truth, almost every fact Rose knew about Jennie came from Wikipedia or had been casually mentioned by Lisa in conversation.

And yet, despite knowing basically no factual information about Jennie’s life, Rose could tell you pretty much every emotion Jennie had experienced in the past five years. Every flash of irritation, rush of excitement, and overdramatic, outsized panic episode over a minor scare – Rose could describe it all with startling precision because Jennie Kim, guarded and prickly and unforthcoming as she may have been, could not muster a poker face to save her life.

This had always been the case. Despite years of intensive interview practice and personality coaching, Jennie remained transparent as glass, her emotions constantly splashed across her features. Her conspicuity had gotten her into trouble in the past; once, her blatant disgust at an interviewer’s question resulted in a week of interview etiquette bootcamp for all four girls. To no avail, of course. Jennie’s face never failed to betray her feelings to anyone paying enough attention to notice.

And these days, her face betrayed her feelings for Lisa _constantly_. Jennie’s affection, concern, possessiveness, doubt, and undeniable fondness for the younger girl were written all over her face, for anyone to see. Rose was honestly just surprised that she hadn’t caught on earlier.

“Have you talked to her about it?” Rose asked Jisoo, who shook her head, attention still directed toward her doodles. Two stick figures, one slightly taller than the other, gained arms and fingers and pin-straight hair under Jisoo’s mindless scribbles.

“I think she’ll figure it out on her own,” Jisoo said, not entirely confidently. The shorter stick figure reached an arm, fingers outstretched, toward the taller one. “Do you think Lisa knows?”

Rose shrugged, glancing over at the closed door. Muffled voices and the sound of drawers being opened and shut leaked into the living room. “How can she not?”

“Do you think she feels the same?” Jisoo followed, and Rose let out a perplexed sigh.

“Honestly, I have no idea what goes on in Lisa’s head,” she confessed, and Jisoo laughed, nodding in agreement.

“Jennie’s easier,” she concurred, and Rose couldn’t agree more. Because Jennie was Jennie, and like it or not (probably not), her bandmates could read her like a magazine.

Lisa on the other hand? Inscrutable.

Lisa was direct and honest, trusting and trustworthy, giving and loyal; Lisa was all of these things, but she was also, somehow, impossible to read. The antithesis of Jennie, Lisa would volunteer any information about Thailand, her dance crew, her family, photography – anything purely factual. But curiously, Lisa invariably avoided disclosing her feelings, and her expression revealed nothing.

The Thai girl seemed to be perpetually happy. At least, that was the only emotion Lisa ever conveyed, concealing everything else behind wide brown eyes and wide smiles. Rose knew Lisa well, better than almost anyone else, but even she couldn’t penetrate the inexplicable barrier the younger girl had constructed. Taciturn and unexpectedly perceptive, Lisa liked to listen more than she liked to speak. All things considered, Rose was fairly certain that Lisa knew the most about all of them, but they knew the least about Lisa.

“Things are going to change soon, I think,” Jisoo foreshadowed cryptically, finally setting down her pen and moving to stand up. Rose nodded slowly, rising from the futon. As she stood, she glanced down at the stick figures Jisoo had sketched below their travel essentials. The shorter one, cat eyes furtive, reached hesitantly toward the taller figure, but a millimeter of blank space separated them.

The taller one’s bangs obscured her eyes, rendering her crooked smile unreadable.


	8. Frisson

Jennie was going crazy, and she was pretty sure it was Lisa’s fault.

Lately, everything the younger girl did set Jennie on edge. Lisa didn’t even have to do anything, and Jennie would find herself stumbling over her words, heart thumping. The other day, Lisa blinked – literally _blinked _– all slow and sleepy while saying goodnight, and Jennie got so caught up watching long eyelashes sweep down that she forgot to respond until long after the younger girl had fallen asleep.

Okay, so it was probably her own fault, but Lisa certainly wasn’t making things any easier. If anything, Jennie’s withdrawal had only prompted an increase in affection from the younger girl, as if Lisa was trying to make up the difference.

Linked arms became interlaced fingers, and what used to be air kisses began landing on Jennie’s cheeks, forehead, nose before bed. Lisa had even taken to waking Jennie up on some (particularly torturous) mornings, wriggling under the covers beside her and wrapping her long limbs around her dozing roommate from behind.

And every time, Jennie pulled away from Lisa quickly, nervously, guiltily, replacing physical affection with mumbled secrets (“I didn’t really want to go to New Zealand,” she whispered once, having just slipped her fingers from Lisa’s grasp. “But they never asked. Not really”).

Lisa never said anything in response, and Jennie was grateful for her silence. The younger girl would just nod silently, accepting the trade, and keep her distance for a bit.

But Jennie was running out of things to tell Lisa. Her little divulgences had drifted from her childhood and her family to trivial observations and private worries and, most recently, literally anything she could think of, anything she hadn’t already shared with the unendingly receptive Thai girl. Lisa always seemed content with anything Jennie disclosed, never pushing for more, but Jennie knew she couldn’t keep this up.

For this reason, Jennie was thoroughly relieved when Rose latched onto Lisa the moment they stepped into the airport, weaving their arms together and leading them toward the lounge buffet.

She was relieved, that is, until Jisoo affixed her with a sharp gaze, lips quirked into a tight smile, and reached for Jennie’s arm.

“I guess it’s you and me,” Jisoo observed, her voice slow and sweet, like honey. Or arsenic.

“Are you excited to go to Thailand?” Jennie tried, but Jisoo just flicked her wrist carelessly, waving the feeble question out of the air. The older Korean girl maintained her silence as they wended their way through the airport, smiling stiffly as her eyes flashed with something flinty and inquisitive.

Jennie was terrified.

Often goofy and prone to making corny jokes, Jisoo rarely displayed her sterner side. Usually, Jennie was the one to keep the younger girls in line, to fend off particularly determined fans, to negotiate with their managers over occasionally unreasonable demands. Jisoo would typically just clean up after Jennie, all sympathetic looks and reassurances. Usually, Jisoo was the good cop to Jennie’s bad cop.

Not today. Today, Jisoo was the good cop, bad cop, investigator, judge, jury, and executioner. The second the pair were free from the cameras, Jisoo dragged her none too gently to a dark corner of the lounge, shoved her down into a chair, and stood over her, arms crossed menacingly.

“What is wrong with you?” Jisoo demanded, and Jennie tried not to shrink down into the chair cushions.

“Nothing,” she responded defensively, and Jisoo rolled her eyes so forcefully that Jennie couldn’t help but wonder if the action caused the older girl physical pain.

“You’re a bad liar, Jennie,” Jisoo retorted, stepping closer. “Something is wrong with you, and you won’t tell me what it is.”

Jennie bristled slightly, her temper rising at the accusation.

“I told you, I’m fine,” she insisted through gritted teeth, and Jisoo’s eyes narrowed into slits. Jennie couldn’t help but quail under the older girl’s piercing gaze, but she intrepidly maintained eye contact. The pair just stared at each other, neither budging, until Jisoo let out a sharp exhale through her nose and closed her eyes in frustration, stepping away from Jennie.

“Look,” she began, gentler this time, and Jennie glanced up at her drawn features. “You don’t have to tell me about it, but you _have_ to stop pushing Lisa away.”

At that, Jennie deflated. Her irritation drained away, leaving only guilt in its place, and she looked down at her boots shamefully.

“Has she said something?” she asked, her voice tiny, and Jisoo opened her eyes again, seemingly surprised by Jennie’s acquiescence. She contemplated the younger girl for a moment in silence, and Jennie felt as if Jisoo could see straight through her.

After a moment, Jisoo shook her head, sighing tiredly.

“Of course not,” she said, eyes hard, and Jennie understood. Of course Lisa hadn’t said anything because Lisa had never complained about anything in her entire life. Someone could smack the Thai girl in the face with a door and she would apologize to both the door and the person walking through it.

“But she’s worried about you, and she notices when you avoid her,” Jisoo chided, and Jennie flinched.

It hurt Jennie – like physically, Jennie could feel a twinge behind her breastbone – that Lisa was hurting, and if anything or anyone else caused that kind of hurt, Jennie would give them the exact same treatment Jisoo was giving her right now.

But there was nothing she could do. Before Jennie could explain what was wrong to Lisa or Jisoo or anyone, she had to figure it out for herself.

“You can talk to me, you know,” Jisoo said softly, breaking into Jennie’s thoughts.

Looking at Jisoo’s furrowed brow and gentle, troubled eyes, Jennie felt another pang of guilt. Jisoo was her best friend, and Jennie had pushed her away as much as she had Lisa.

“I know, _unni_,” Jennie said quietly, reaching out and gingerly tugging at one of Jisoo’s hands until the older girl unfolded her arms. “I just… don’t think I’m ready to talk about it yet.”

She still wasn’t even sure what _it_ meant, but she knew she wanted to think it through on her own before dragging Jisoo into it.

“That’s okay,” Jisoo murmured. “I’ll be here when you are.”

Jennie smiled wanly, feeling a prickling at the bridge of her nose and willing herself not to cry.

She stood, looping her arm through Jisoo’s again. As the pair migrated back toward the younger girls, Jennie cast a sidelong glance at Jisoo.

“Thank you,” she murmured, and Jisoo just nodded, giving Jennie’s arm a squeeze.

The two rejoined Rose and Lisa, who had assembled an array of snacks and colorful beverage cans.

“What took you so long?” Lisa groaned, hauling herself up from where she had been lying slumped across a chair. Her words were directed at both of them, but she locked eyes with Jennie as she brushed her bangs out of her eyes with long, slim fingers.

Jennie shivered.

“Learn some patience,” Jisoo scolded, and Lisa laughed, her face brightening.

“Didn’t you miss me too?” she teased, wrapping an arm around Jisoo’s shoulders and wrangling the older girl into a suffocating hug.

“Not at all,” Jisoo groused, struggling to free herself from Lisa’s grasp.

“Let’s go eat,” Rose broke in, gesturing plaintively toward the untouched pile of snacks. Her entreaty went ignored as Lisa continued to maintain her grip on Jisoo, smushing her face against the older girl’s and making little kissing noises.

Observing their antics, Jennie couldn’t help but chuckle. They were such children sometimes. Turning away, she reached for a muffin and a purple can, and Rose shot her a grateful look before scooping three cans and the rest of the snacks into her arms.

They managed to make it onto the plane with little incident, save the tragic death of Little Yellow (Jennie felt for Rose, she did, but that fish was definitely just swimming in circles the last time Jennie saw it. It was really only a matter of time). When they boarded the plane, Rose pulled Lisa into the seat next to her, and Jennie was again grateful for some space from Lisa.

Lisa, with her sleepy brown eyes and tousled bangs.

Lisa, who liked to lower the seat partition and nestle her head in the crook of Jennie’s shoulder, smelling of citrus and jasmine.

Lisa, whose mere presence could make Jennie shiver, little sparks prickling at the nape of her neck.

No, Jennie definitely couldn’t handle that right now, so she flopped into the seat beside Jisoo and let the older girl chatter about Dalgom and fried chicken and Cookie Run for the duration of the flight.

In fact, thanks to Rose, who clung to Lisa throughout the entire journey to Thailand, Jennie hardly interacted with Lisa until after they had touched down, collected their bags, driven across Bangkok, and settled into their hotel rooms.

Things went downhill for Jennie quickly after that.

“Lisa have you seen my toothbr-”

“Jennie!” Lisa whirled around, bringing her arms up to cover her – Jennie’s breath hitched – bare chest. Cheeks burning, Jennie dropped her eyes to the floor, but not before getting an eyeful of sloping shoulders, sharp collarbones, and teasing freckles smattered across creamy skin.

So much _skin_.

“I’m sorry,” Jennie stuttered as she frantically backed out of the doorway, smacking her hand painfully against the doorframe in her haste.

“Wait!” Lisa called, but Jennie was already halfway down the hallway, nursing her throbbing knuckles. She fled to her room, slamming the door shut behind her.

Heart pounding, Jennie flopped face-first down in the bed. She could hear Rose in the bathroom, singing to herself as she washed up. Burying her face in a pillow, Jennie groaned. She could feel warmth spreading across her face, down her neck, and _lower_, pooling in the pit of her stomach.

Jennie had seen Lisa naked before; the Thai girl had always been comfortable – arguably too comfortable – lounging around their dormitory in various states of undress. Lisa’s penchant for nudity had never bothered Jennie back then, but in the weeks since they’d moved into the house, two things had happened: first, the constant presence of cameras had required Lisa to be fully clothed at all times, making this the first time Jennie had seen Lisa undressed in a while.

Second (and more importantly), something between Jennie and Lisa had shifted. Something big. Something that made Jennie’s breath catch when Lisa swept her hair behind her shoulder, that sent a jolt down her spine when Lisa winked at her, that made her stomach clench and her heart race when Lisa’s skin made contact with hers.

Something that Jennie had tried to ignore for so long.

A tentative knock interrupted Jennie’s thoughts, and she propped herself up on her forearms to see Lisa, fully clothed this time, hesitantly pushing the door open.

“Come in,” Jennie mumbled, trying desperately to compose herself but the image of Lisa’s slender frame still burned in her mind.

“Is everything alright?” Lisa asked gently, and Jennie felt the bed dip as the younger girl sat gingerly at the edge. Pulling herself into a seated position, back against the headboard and arms wrapped around her knees, Jennie nodded.

“Yes, I just- is that my toothbrush?” Lisa glanced down at the toothbrush in her hand with some surprise, having seemingly forgotten about it.

“Oh yeah, I must have grabbed it by accident.” Scooting closer to Jennie on the bed, Lisa held the toothbrush out for the older girl to grab. When Jennie reached for it, her fingers brushed Lisa’s, and she felt a shock of electricity. Like, literally.

Lisa pulled her hand back in surprise at the static shock, eyes widening comically, and Jennie couldn’t help but giggle at her startled expression. At the sound of Jennie’s laugh, Lisa visibly relaxed, tension rushing out of her shoulders as she scrunched her nose in protest.

“Hey, don’t laugh at me,” she objected. “You look so funny right now.”

As she spoke, Lisa leaned forward and extended an arm to smooth down Jennie’s hair, which static had no doubt caused to stick up wildly. Without thinking, Jennie caught Lisa’s wrist midair, causing the younger girl to freeze, eyes big.

It couldn’t have been longer than three seconds that Jennie spent locked in Lisa’s stare, her fingers wrapped around a slim wrist, their faces inches apart. For a single, protracted moment, Jennie took Lisa in: the arch of her eyebrow, the hazel shades of her iris, the curve of her jaw.

She was so beautiful.

Sitting on that hotel bed in Thailand, transfixed by Lisa’s sparkling, unguarded gaze, Jennie felt something inside herself give way. Her heart quickened, mingled wonder and affection for the younger girl flooding over her. Jennie could feel the hairs on the back of her neck raise as goosebumps erupted along her skin. 

Pure frisson.

On the one hand, Jennie was taken aback by the sudden intensity of her feelings for the younger girl. It was as if every stolen glance, every suppressed longing, every buried desire had resurfaced all at once, urgent and immediate and overwhelming.

But on the other, how could she resist?

Everything about Lisa, from her shining eyes to the way she moved, invited attention. Charming, mischievous, delicate, and so, so _good_, Lisa was simply magnetic, and Jennie couldn’t help but be drawn into her orbit.

Then Jennie returned to herself, hastily releasing Lisa’s wrist and shying away from the younger girl.

“I have to sleep,” Jennie blurted, trying to ignore the Thai girl’s crestfallen expression.

Lisa hesitated for a moment, looking at Jennie’s face as Jennie looked straight ahead, then she nodded slowly and stood up from the bed.

“Goodnight Jennie,” Lisa murmured, making her way out of the room and softly shutting the door behind her.

Jennie exhaled a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, sinking further into the bedsheets.

She wasn’t sure when they had started or how they had begun, if they had developed slowly, building toward a critical mass, or if one day, something had changed and they had just appeared out of nowhere, but the fact of the matter was this:

Jennie had strong, undeniable, and definitely non-platonic feelings for Lisa.

But somehow, that acknowledgement, which abruptly explained weeks of inner turmoil, didn’t make Jennie feel any better. If anything, the Korean girl only felt more conflicted.

She couldn’t act on these feelings; there was too much at stake. She could lose everything: her contract, her fans, her groupmates, _Lisa_.

But Jennie also wasn’t certain if she could continue to fight them, to hide the way her body reacted to Lisa’s touch, the way her heart jumped at the sound of the younger girl’s voice.

Now that the floodgates had opened and she understood what it was like to feel so much for someone (it felt _really_ good), she was pretty sure there was no going back.

Long story short, Jennie was fucked.


	9. Patience

“This is what Lisa likes,” Jennie observed, pointing at the plate nearest to her on the table. “It’s mango sticky rice.”

Lisa nodded, eyes darting around the spread. Still processing the sudden appearance of all of her favorite foods, she continued to peruse the selection until she spied a familiar, spiky dish.

“_Unni_!” she squealed at Jennie, pointing at the crab curry the older girl had been craving since their arrival in Thailand. “You wanted to eat this.”

Earlier that year, Jennie had spent one of their rare vacation opportunities visiting Thailand. Despite insisting that they had planned the trip at her mother’s request, Jennie had spent the entire week with Lisa, sometimes with their mothers, but mostly just the two of them.

It was the best week of Lisa’s life.

Jennie had described the trip as the Lisa tour of Thailand, but it had been so long since she’d been back that it was more like a rediscovery of her hometown. They went sightseeing, hiding in crowds, and watched sunsets from rooftop bars. At night, they snuck away to Lisa’s favorite, secret places, eating crab curry on cheap plastic chairs and watching hazy city lights flicker from hilltops.

With Jennie, Bangkok had felt like a new city, foreign and exciting.

“This is amazing,” Jennie mused as Lisa pulled out a chair to sit down. In classic fashion, Rose had already seated herself and was gazing about hungrily, seemingly deciding what to eat first.

“Everything I like is here. How did they know?” Lisa asked, directing the question toward no one in particular. She couldn’t recall anyone asking her which foods she liked, but somehow they all appeared here.

“This one is like something my mom makes at home,” she said, a vague suspicion brewing in the back of her head as she slowly connected the dots.

“It’s like your mom’s cooking?” Jisoo asked, and Lisa nodded in affirmation.

“Maybe your mom made it,” Jennie supplied.

“It seems like it,” Lisa agreed, weighing the possibility of their managers having gone to her house to retrieve her mother’s home cooking.

“I doubt it,” Jisoo said gently, and Lisa understood the older girl’s hesitance to get her hopes up. Still, she couldn’t help the hopeful, nagging feeling that her family was somehow involved in preparing the feast.

“I really think so,” she insisted, taking a picture of the food to send to her mom.

“Time to eat,” Jennie said, cutting into her protests. Lisa nodded and put her phone away, fully prepared to drop the subject, but then the red fondue pot at the edge of the table caught her eye.

“No, this is from my house!” she exclaimed.

“Now she’s saying this is hers,” Jisoo said to Jennie, who burst out laughing.

“I’m serious, this is from home!” she persisted with some affront. “It’s for cheese fondue.”

At that moment, the doorbell rang, and Lisa felt her heart lurch into stomach. She glanced at Jennie with wide, optimistic eyes.

Seeing her expression, Jennie turned away abruptly and made a beeline for the entryway. Lisa trailed after her, glad not to be the one opening the door. If it wasn’t her parents, she would be devastated, and maybe Jennie knew that too, because she quickly swung the door open before Lisa had even rounded the corner to the hallway.

But then, Lisa’s greatest hopes were confirmed when Jennie shrieked in excitement, stepping out of the doorframe to reveal her beaming parents.

Lisa was truly home.

The next few moments were a blur of hugs and tears. The most sensitive of the four of them, Rose began crying almost immediately, likely on behalf of herself and Lisa. As both her closest friend and a fellow foreigner, Rose knew more than anyone how hard it was for Lisa to be so far from her family.

But Lisa even caught Jisoo, mature, stoic Jisoo, quickly wiping a tear from her eye at the reunion.

As she pulled her mother into a hug, a flood of mingled joy and relief washed over Lisa, who hadn’t seen her family in nearly a year.

When she hadn’t heard anything from them upon her arrival in Thailand, she had been worried and disappointed, though she tried hard not to show it. It was just that her opportunities to see them were so rare these days, and she had been certain that she could’ve sweet-talked her managers into letting her sneak away to spend time with her parents.

Lisa was used to the separation; she had signed up for this, after all. But it was different here, in Thailand, where nothing felt like home without her family.

She had tried to put it out of her mind, but ever since that first night, when she had thought things with Jennie had shifted for the better, the older girl had been keeping her distance, which only added to the loneliness Lisa had been feeling. Dealing with her parents’ silence had already been difficult enough, but in conjunction with Jennie’s recent detachment, Lisa had wondered if she was doing something wrong.

A quick sniffle from her mother brought Lisa out of her reflection, and she felt a sharp tug in her gut. She wasn’t the only one affected by the distance.

“Don’t cry,” she admonished jokingly, pulling away. “If you cry, I’ll cry.”

She spoke in Korean, remembering the cameras, but she meant it. Lisa tried her hardest not to cry in front of her parents, not wanting them to know how much her dreams cost her. Even when she had been a trainee, unsure of whether or not her sacrifices would pay off, she had only told them the good news and dealt with the hard times on her own.

After everything they had sacrificed sending her away, how could she burden them with her doubts and struggles?

But as Jennie and Rose conversed in English with her parents, Lisa felt tears prick at her eyes. Her parents, her groupmates, her _family_. Seeing them all together like that, Lisa couldn’t help the wave of affection and gratitude for these people who supported and loved her that washed over her.

“What did I tell you?” Lisa asked, shaking off the rush of emotions and pointing indignantly at the fondue pot. “This really is from my house.”

“I really didn’t believe you until the end,” Jisoo acknowledged, taking her cue and sitting down at the table.

“It’s been a while since you’ve seen your parents,” Jennie said, observing Lisa’s apparent stoicism. “Are you happy?”

Noting the gentle concern in Jennie’s tone, Lisa nodded vigorously.

“I almost cried, but I stopped myself. If I start crying, I’ll just keep going,” she explained, and Jennie nodded in understanding.

At that, Rose whined softly. “I’m gonna cry,” she said, fanning away more tears.

“She’s crying,” Jisoo confirmed, rolling her eyes affectionately as Rose covered her face in embarrassment.

“It’s so touching,” Rose defended herself, and Lisa was again reminded of just how lucky she was. She never thought that she’d make friends who would cry for her.

Once they had all reined in their emotions, they dug into the elaborately prepared food, and any worries Lisa had about their eating habits concerning her parents vanished.

She had never seen her bandmates eat so much, trying at least one bite of everything and even finishing some of the dishes. Jisoo even put on a little show for her parents, making them a couple of rather uninspiring but lovingly-crafted cocktails.

After the meal, Lisa again found herself willing away tears as she flipped through the scrapbook her mom made, reading the supportive notes inscribed in Thai.

She lingered on a picture of two figures, silhouetted against a watercolor sunset. Captured from behind, they looked out over the city sprawled below, the shorter figure leaning against the taller.

Lisa remembered that moment vividly: the blazing sky bathing their faces in pink light, the warmth of the smaller girl’s body nestled against her own, the unreserved wonder shining in Jennie’s eyes as she turned, breathless and heady, to meet Lisa’s gaze.

Lisa remembered it so clearly because that was when she had realized, consciously, something that she had always known.

In that moment, there had been no resistance or doubt, only a sort of calm certainty. Lisa had settled into that certainty, watching Jennie watch the sun dip below the horizon with a single thought running through her mind.

_I like you_.

It had all been so straightforward to her, and she had reveled in the feeling that was, like Bangkok during that trip, both new and familiar to her.

Below the picture, her mother had simply written: my Lisa and her Jennie.

Lisa glanced up at Jennie to see her looking back at Lisa, a curious blend of emotions written on her face. Deliberation, guilt, and something else, something Lisa couldn’t quite identify.

Jennie broke eye contact, quickly returning her gaze to her own scrapbook, and Lisa stifled a sigh. When had things gotten so complicated?

Pushing herself up from her chair, she drifted to the kitchen, where her mother was puttering around, tidying up.

“Is everything okay?” her mother asked without preamble, surprising Lisa.

“Yes, don’t worry,” she reassured, but her mother just shook her head.

“Don’t lie to me, Lalisa,” she chastised, shooting a glance at Jennie’s seated figure, and Lisa had to laugh; her mom always saw right through her.

“I miss her,” Lisa admitted, grateful that the girl seated just a few feet away couldn’t understand her.

“Does she know that?” her mother asked, and Lisa shrugged.

“She keeps pushing me away. She barely talks to me anymore.” She could hear the pain in her own voice, and her mother smiled sadly at her daughter’s distress.

“She cares about you very much, but I think it’s hard for her.” Lisa nodded slowly, considering Jennie’s own internal struggles.

“It’s complicated, I guess,” she sighed. “I don’t know why it has to be, though.”

At that, her mother laughed. “People are complicated, Lalisa. Be patient. Everything good takes time.”

Her mother smiled then, the lines around her eyes crinkling, as she cupped Lisa’s cheek in her palm. “I know you’ll work it out.”

Lisa closed her eyes and leaned into her mom’s hand, taking solace in the comforting touch.

“I miss you,” she said after a beat, and her mother nodded.

“We miss you too. All the time.”

Just then, Jisoo stepped into the kitchen and laid a gentle hand on Lisa’s shoulder, regret painted on her features.

“It’s time to say goodbye,” Jisoo said, glaring over at the cameramen, who had just finished packing up their equipment.

Lisa nodded, drawing her mom into another hug and kissing her on the forehead. There was never enough time, but she was glad for any opportunity to see her family, no matter how briefly.

After they had all said their goodbyes, they were prompted to quickly change their clothes and pile into the van, continuing on to their next destination.

Lisa spent the entire drive staring out the window, her mom’s advice echoing in her head. Preoccupied with her thoughts, she absentmindedly followed her bandmates into the hotel lobby, up the elevator, and out onto the rooftop.

“It’s so pretty I'm going to cry,” Rose whined, yanking Lisa from her brooding. Only then did she recognize the setting, elevated high above the city.

The scrapbook picture, accompanied by her mother’s words, flashed into Lisa’s mind. She glanced over at Jennie who was leaning against the railing and smiling broadly as Jisoo took her photo.

Between shots, Jennie caught Lisa’s gaze. But this time, instead of looking away, Jennie held her stare, her smile softening into something delicate and real.

Time slowed down. The city melted away, the lights and sunset fading into the background as Lisa’s vision tunneled until all she could see was Jennie smiling back at her, the wind whipping through her hair.

_Her_ Jennie.

Then Jisoo pulled Jennie’s attention away to show her the pictures, and Lisa blinked dazedly as the rest of the world rushed back in.

“You okay?” Rose asked, suddenly appearing beside her. Lisa jumped, startled, and turned to meet Rose’s curious stare.

“Yeah,” she responded. Then, spying the camera clutched in Rose’s hand, she narrowed her eyes. “Is that mine?”

Rose nodded unapologetically. “I want pretty pictures too. I had to dig through your bag to find it; why do you carry so much stuff around?”

Lisa scowled in mock offense, plucking the camera from Rose’s hand.

“So nosy chipmunks can't get at my stuff,” she teased, and Rose huffed. “Say cheese,” she prompted before Rose could respond, bringing the camera up to capture the older girl’s indignation.

They continued on like that, taking pictures in various configurations and poses until the sun had long disappeared behind the skyline.

“The last time we were here, the vibe was really good,” Lisa said, once they all sat down.

“It was great here,” Jennie agreed. “But we weren’t allowed to take pictures, so we didn’t have any when we went back to Korea.”

She shot a sidelong glance at Lisa, a smile playing about her lips. “If you come here, you really know what the night in Bangkok is like.”

Lisa shivered, the unexpected warmth blooming in her chest a stark contrast to the crisp night air. Rose and Jisoo hopped up to play Titanic, leaving Lisa and Jennie alone at the table, and Lisa felt a sudden sense of urgency.

She had to say something.

As she turned in her chair to get the Korean girl’s attention, however, a waiter appeared with a tray of drinks, prompting Jisoo and Rose to rejoin them at the table.

“Let’s toast to our first trip,” Jisoo said, and Lisa sighed inwardly, leaning back in her seat and picking up her drink. Bringing the glass to her mouth, she took a long sip, the sickly sweet juice only accentuating the bitter taste of alcohol.

Lisa took another sip. And another.

“Did your parents leave?” Jisoo asked, observing Lisa’s unusually heavy draughts and subtly handing her own drink to the younger girl.

“Yeah,” Lisa said, setting down her now-empty glass and taking a sip of Jisoo’s drink. It was icy and sweet enough to make her teeth hurt.

“Really?” Jisoo asked, eyes still on Lisa. “Lisa used to be the only one who would come over to our houses and eat with our parents, so I’m glad we got the chance to have a meal with her parents.”

Lisa smiled broadly, already feeling a mild buzz from the alcohol. They rarely drank, Lisa least of all, so it only took a few sips to get tipsy.

And Lisa was halfway through her second drink.

They sat a while longer, long enough for Lisa to finish Jisoo’s drink, reminiscing and enjoying the view. Around them, the residual light leached out of the sky as dusk gave way to twilight.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” Rose told Jisoo as they were standing to leave.

“Okay?” Jisoo raised an eyebrow at the younger girl, who pouted.

“I don’t want to go alone,” Rose whined.

Jisoo sighed, nodding, and begrudgingly followed Rose down the stairs to the restroom, calling over her shoulder, “We’ll meet you guys downstairs.”

Alone again, Lisa and Jennie stood against the railing in comfortable silence for a moment, looking out at the shimmering city.

“Jennie,” Lisa started, and the older girl cocked her head to look at her inquisitively.

Lisa trailed off, eyes skating across Jennie’s face, and they stood there staring at each other, faces inches apart. As the breeze died down, the night air hung between them, expectant and still.

It felt as if the entire city were holding its breath.

Tearing her gaze from Lisa’s, Jennie made as if to pull away, cheeks rosy, but Lisa gently grasped the older girl’s arm, silently asking her to stay, to stop running.

Jennie’s tongue darted out to nervously wet parted lips.

Lisa’s eyes followed it.

Maybe it was the alcohol, making everything – the city lights, the stars, Jennie’s eyes – seem brighter and clearer and making Lisa reckless and bold. Maybe it was the setting, the same place she first felt that now-familiar tugging sensation in her gut.

Or maybe Lisa just ran out of patience.

She leaned in quickly, before her courage could leave her, and captured Jennie’s lips with her own.

The kiss was chaste, a simple pressing of lips against one another, shy and soft, but it felt bigger, filling Lisa’s senses and drowning out the background noise.

It felt like tectonic plates sliding over each other, like stepping off a rollercoaster with blood still roaring in your ears, like crawling out of the ocean and flopping down on the warm sand, giddy and enervated.

It felt like being carried away.

Lisa pulled away, eyes blinking open slowly, to see Jennie standing frozen with wide, shocked eyes and flushed cheeks.

They stared at each other for a moment, Jennie seemingly dumbstruck and Lisa intoxicated on a dizzying combination of alcohol, adrenaline, and _Jennie_.

Lisa was, frankly, thrilled. She had spent weeks feeling isolated from the older girl, being pushed farther and farther away. But now, here Jennie was, blurry and beautiful and so, so close.

Jennie, on the other hand, seemed less thrilled.

“I’m sorry,” she stammered, her face a storm of emotions.

Hastily drawing back from Lisa, she jerked her arm from the younger girl’s grasp and fled downstairs.

Bewildered and alone on the rooftop, Lisa felt her stomach sink.


	10. Carousel

They separated immediately upon arriving at the riverfront market. Jennie practically yanked Jisoo toward the shops while Rose tugged a dazed Lisa toward the Ferris wheel, a tiny crinkle in the Australian girl’s forehead the only indication of her mounting concern.

As soon as the carriage doors closed, Rose shut off her camera and pivoted sharply to look at Lisa, who was appearing less tipsy and more hungover by the minute.

“What happened back there?”

——————————————————

“Lisa kissed me,” Jennie confessed. Just saying the words aloud sent another shiver down her spine, and she swallowed nervously.

“Just like that?” Jisoo asked, eyebrows raised. Jennie nodded quickly, her eyes darting up to meet Jisoo’s. Jisoo could feel the younger girl searching her face, gauging her reaction, but she kept her expression neutral.

“On the mouth,” Jennie continued, still watching Jisoo, but the older girl gave nothing away, simply arching an eyebrow in response. “Isn’t that weird?” she pressed on.

“Isn’t what weird?” Jisoo asked, tone intentionally light.

“Isn’t it weird for a girl to kiss another girl like that?”

At that, Jisoo cocked her head to consider the girl walking beside her. “I don’t think so. Are you a homophobe, Jennie?”

“What? Of course not,” Jennie huffed indignantly, and Jisoo suppressed a smile. She knew she shouldn’t be teasing, but Jennie needed to just say what she meant. Besides, the girl made it way too easy.

“I don’t even think I _could_ be a homophobe,” Jennie muttered after a pause, gaze fixed to the sidewalk.

“What do you mean?”

“I think I like girls,” Jennie blurted. Her cheeks flushing, she stammered on, “Well, one girl, in particular. Lisa.”

——————————————————

“Does that mean you like Jennie?” Rose asked.

“Well, yeah, that’s why I kissed her.” Lisa’s head was beginning to hurt, and she regretted her impulsive actions more and more with each passing second.

Rose marveled at her bluntness. She couldn’t help but compare Lisa to Jennie, who seemed to be having a harder time coming to terms with her feelings.

“Do you think she knows that?” Rose wondered, watching Lisa massage her temples with long fingers.

For the first time since stepping into the carriage, Lisa pulled her gaze up from the floor, and Rose felt a sharp twinge of sympathy at the dejection swimming in the younger girl’s eyes. Usually so effortlessly self-assured, Lisa had never looked so lost.

Rose scowled inwardly. Jennie better fix this soon, or Rose was going to have words with the stubborn Korean girl.

“I’ve been pretty open about my feelings, but she must not feel the same way,” Lisa said, voice small.

Rose sighed, wondering how a person could be so perceptive and yet so oblivious at the same time.

“Are you blind?” she asked wearily, glancing down at the lights of the market through the smudged carriage window. “When she’s not spiraling into full-on gay panic, Jennie spends all her time looking at you like she wants to _eat_ you.”

——————————————————

“Is it that obvious?” Jennie winced, replaying her behavior over the last few weeks in her head. Maybe avoiding Lisa like the plague hadn’t been the most subtle tactic to hide her burgeoning feelings.

“I would just stay out of the casinos, if I were you,” Jisoo teased, squeezing Jennie’s arm reassuringly as the pair walked down the sidewalk.

Jennie just frowned, her brow creasing. “I’ve been trying to get over this… whatever this is, but it’s hard when we spend all of our time together.”

“Get over it?” Jisoo repeated inquisitively.

“Obviously.” Jennie flicked her hair over her shoulder, casting a discreet glance at the ever-present cameramen. “It’s impossible.”

Jisoo couldn’t say that Jennie’s worries weren’t justified; it was pretty difficult to date _anyone_ without scandal, much less another girl. But she also couldn’t keep watching Jennie literally run from rooms to avoid interacting with Lisa.

“And so,” Jennie continued before Jisoo could respond, “I’ve been trying to get some distance from Lisa because, well,” Jennie paused.

Because she couldn’t think when Lisa was around. Because she was starting to judge the quality of her days by the number of times Lisa flashed her that cheeky grin.

Because every second Jennie spent with Lisa made it harder to get over her.

“Because Lisa’s just, you know, _Lisa_,” she continued hastily. “She’s so affectionate, and I don’t want to hurt her feelings, but if she kisses me again, I’ll probably just die.”

“Hold on,” Jisoo frowned, stopping so suddenly that Jennie nearly tripped over her own feet. “You think that Lisa kissed you out of affection?”

When Jennie just shrugged, nodding, Jisoo turned to face the younger girl. Crossing her arms across her chest, she stared Jennie down in the middle of the sidewalk. She was tired of this idiotic carousel, and she refused to let Jennie and Lisa keep fruitlessly chasing each other in circles.

“Lisa is always watching out for you. She puts a blanket over you when you fall asleep on the couch. She looks for you in crowds, just to make sure you’re okay. When you perform, she cheers embarrassingly loudly, she carries your bags while you shop, and she gives you the last bite of her food.

“I’m pretty sure she would do just about anything to make you happy. What do you think that all means?”

Jennie blinked at Jisoo for a moment, taken aback. Then, she shook her head slowly, frowning. “That’s just how Lisa is.”

Amused in spite of herself, Jisoo felt a smile tug at the corner of her mouth. “You think that because that’s how she is with you.”

Before Jennie could protest, Jisoo went on, “And maybe you don’t see it, but I do. I see how she worries about you. I see the way she looks at you, all soft and serious, like she wants to give you everything. I see her when you’re not around, when she misses you. I see how she waits for you when we end practice, when we get onstage, when we go out.”

Jisoo held Jennie’s gaze, determined to get through to the clueless girl. “You’re so _slow_, Jen. Like, always. You take forever to do everything. But Lisa waits for you anyway.

“Don’t you think you’ve kept her waiting long enough?”

Jennie just stared back, at a loss for words.

Feeling that she had made her point, Jisoo just grabbed Jennie’s wrist and began pulling her down the sidewalk.

“Now come on, I want to ride go-karts.”

——————————————————

“Wha-”

“Hey!”

Having just been unceremoniously shoved into Jisoo and Lisa’s small shared bedroom, Lisa and Jennie whirled around to see the door slamming shut behind them.

“Stay in there until you figure things out,” Jisoo commanded sternly from behind the door. Lisa could hear Rose’s muffled giggle, along with the sound of the scheming pair’s fading footsteps.

Sighing, Lisa turned to tell Jennie that they could probably just leave but was met with an accusatory stare.

“Why did you kiss me?” Jennie’s voice was quiet, but her eyes bored into Lisa’s.

Lisa half-shrugged, glancing away from the older girl. “Because I wanted to.”

She didn’t really get all the confusion (what other explanation could there be?), but she was starting to feel like she had done something wrong, so she sidestepped, attempting to defuse the situation with what she figured was an adequately neutral answer.

Jennie took the response like a slap in the face. She felt like a fool. Jisoo’s lecture had gotten in her head, convincing her that Lisa might feel the same way, that these weeks of emotional distress might actually result in something. But the younger girl’s indifference was clear.

Even though Jennie had known this would be the outcome, it stung nonetheless. Feeling tears prick at her eyes, she walked quickly to the door, letting her hair shield her face as she brushed past Lisa.

Fingers shaky, Jennie began to open the door, but then she stopped, hand on the doorknob, and whirled back around to meet Lisa’s surprised gaze.

“I like you,” she confessed hopelessly. A tear threatened to spill over, blurring her vision. “More than I should.” She let it fall, felt it carve a hot path down her cheek on its way to the floor.

Jennie was tired of holding back.

“I like you because you make me laugh, and you give me back massages, and you know what I want to eat before I do. You’re warm and patient and open and _good_; you’re everything I’m not and everything I need. And I know that I like you because you make my palms sweat and my head spin. Because being near you makes me dizzy, and sometimes, I have to get away from you or I’ll explode.

“And I know you don’t like me like that, but I think I won’t be able to get over it until I tell you. So this is me telling you: I like you a lot, and I’m sorry for that.”

Having said her piece, Jennie made as if to leave, but Lisa caught her wrist for the second time that night, holding her in place.

Staring up at Lisa, eyelashes flecked with tears and cheeks pink, Jennie had never looked so vulnerable. Or so beautiful. Jennie’s confession had provoked a swirl of emotions in Lisa, one that she saw mirrored in the other girl’s watery eyes. 

Lisa brought up a hand to catch another teardrop as it fell, gently swiping it away with her thumb. “I like you too,” she said softly, tracing Jennie’s cheekbone with her fingertips.

Rather than having the desired effect, the words caused Jennie’s face to twist in disbelief as she stepped back from Lisa’s touch. “You don’t have to try to make me feel better.”

Lisa’s brow furrowed, and she moved closer still, cornering Jennie against the door. “I mean it.”

“How can you?” Jennie’s eyes darted away from Lisa’s as she spat the words out, seemingly determined to be this unlovable thing. “You don’t even know me, not really. You’ve only ever known me as Blackpink’s Jennie or YG Trainee Jennie, but I was someone else before all this.”

Jennie hadn’t meant for the words to injure, but she did mean them. And maybe that’s what hurt Lisa so much, because the statement provoked in Lisa a response Jennie had seen so rarely she had begun to believe it never happened at all.

Lisa – cool, easygoing, everything-will-be-fine Lisa Manoban ­­– got angry. Lisa, whose sunny levelheadedness bordered on impassivity, was suddenly flared to temper by Jennie’s offhand accusation.

“How can you say that?” she growled, and in spite of herself, Jennie felt a rush of desire at the younger girl’s low, demanding tone. Their close proximity, with Lisa’s blazing eyes just inches from her own, did nothing to help stifle the surge of longing.

Before Jennie had a chance to reply, to quell her inexplicable lust and formulate a response, Lisa continued, “I _know_ you, Jennie. I know why you love the holidays but hate the New Year, why you went to New Zealand and how you needed to come back. I know that you taught yourself how to play the flute, to cook, to embroider, to speak English in all the time you spent on your own over there.

“I know that you like taking pictures but get shy in front of the camera. That you like dogs, the number three, fireworks, and hyacinths because you’re vain like that. I know that you hate scary movies but like the adrenaline rush of being scared, and you think you would love rollercoasters if you weren’t so motion sick, and that you like being alone but hate being lonely.”

Stunned, Jennie weakly responded, “You make me sound like a cat.”

Lisa snorted, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. “I love cats.”

Then she leaned in, closing the tiny gap between them, and kissed Jennie for the second time. Only this time, she did it with conviction, bringing her hand up again to cup Jennie’s cheek in her palm, long fingers gently stroking the skin below Jennie’s ear.

And this time, Jennie gave in, closed her eyes and gave herself over to the cataract of suppressed desire that crashed over her.

How could she not? With the way Lisa’s soft lips slanted over her own, the way lights burst into kaleidoscopic patterns behind her eyelids, the way her body responded in kind, arching off the door to meet Lisa’s – she could do nothing but surrender to the younger girl, to herself.

So Jennie kissed Lisa back with everything she had. Parting her lips to allow Lisa’s tongue, warm and curious, to slide against her own, she brought her own arms to lock around the taller girl’s neck, pulling her impossibly closer.

When Lisa finally pulled away, breathless, to rest her forehead against Jennie’s, she let out a chuckle at the dazed look in Jennie’s eyes as they fluttered open. “Believe me?”

Jennie just buried her face in Lisa’s hair, dropping her arms to the Thai girl’s waist and inhaling the familiar combination of jasmine and citrus and vanilla and _Lisa_. She didn’t want to say anything, didn’t want to move and risk breaking this perfect moment where Lisa was holding her and looking at her like that and nothing else in the damn world mattered but the two of them, here and now, together like this.

But then Lisa brought her hand up to run her fingers through Jennie’s long hair, stroking her scalp in soothing, rhythmic motions, and Jennie felt her heart leap as if reaching toward Lisa’s own.

Time shuddered onwards, propelling the pair back into reality, but for once, Jennie wasn’t afraid of what the future might bring. Wrapped up in Lisa’s scent and slender arms, the younger girl’s calming touch quieting her doubts, Jennie felt safe.


	11. Tease

“Hi Kim Jisoo, Hi Jennie Kim,” Rose read from the notes left on the coffee table in their lavish Koh Samui suite.

“Oh, this is our room,” Jisoo laughed to Jennie, shooting her a look.

Jennie scanned the notes, simultaneously disappointed and relieved. As much as she would’ve liked to share a room with Lisa, Jennie’s already minimal self-control had been pushed to its limits over the past few days, and she wasn’t sure how much longer she could resist the urge to shove Lisa against the nearest wall and have her way with her.

It shouldn’t be that hard considering she’d been keeping it together for months (if not years) at this point, but after their kiss the night before, Lisa had gotten a lot… _bolder_. Perhaps spurred on by the simple fact that she could, Lisa had taken every opportunity to fluster Jennie, seeming to delight in the reactions she elicited from the older girl.

It had begun almost immediately, with Lisa crawling between Rose and Jennie to wake the pair up that morning. After not-so-tenderly smacking Rose in the face, the lanky girl had flung her arms around Jennie, snuggling up behind her and dropping light kisses to her exposed shoulders. Jennie had groaned and burrowed deeper into the comforter, attempting to both fall back asleep and hide the blush rising in her cheeks.

Lisa’s affections – if they could even be called that, as Jennie had begun to consider them more as assaults against common decency – only escalated from there.

At brunch, after bombarding Jennie with compliments (to the great amusement of Jisoo and Rose, who had intuited the events of the previous night from the pair’s return to semi-normal behavior), Lisa had casually brushed a sandaled foot against Jennie’s ankle underneath the table. That harmless contact, which disappeared upon the arrival of their food, was Jennie’s only warning for what was to follow.

Shortly after the group had begun eating, Jennie had felt Lisa’s foot bump against hers again. Only this time, the mischievous Thai girl hadn’t restricted herself to a mere touch, choosing instead to drag her foot slowly up the length of Jennie’s calf.

Jennie had glanced up from her plate, directing a cautionary glare toward Lisa, but the younger girl, absorbed in conversation with Jisoo, wasn’t even looking at her. Twitching her leg away and returning her attention to the food in front of her, Jennie had just speared a french fry on her fork and lifted it to her mouth when Lisa’s foot returned, trailing all the way up Jennie’s leg to her inner thigh.

Startled and more than a little turned on, Jennie had nearly choked on her fish and chips. Lisa had the gall to look surprised as Jennie coughed violently, but beneath her mask of concern, Jennie caught a flash of something sharp and suggestive in the Thai girl’s eyes.

Jennie had just about melted on the spot, reduced to jelly by a simple, albeit lustful, glance from Lisa.

Just thinking about it now made Jennie shiver and – after retrieving her mind from the gutter – accept the room assignments without complaint, jokingly asking Rose and Lisa to leave their room.

After a few obligatory photos, the younger girls said their goodnights. Rose, having quietly eaten both macarons meant for Jennie and Jisoo, left first in hopes of stealing Lisa’s as well.

Lisa followed shortly after, but not before pausing at the doorway to kiss Jennie goodnight. Pinning the Korean girl against the doorframe with her long body, Lisa leaned down to press her soft lips against Jennie’s. The kiss was brief, but Jennie still found herself stifling a moan at the sensation of the younger girl pressing up against her.

After a moment, long enough to relight the fire in Jennie’s stomach but short enough to leave her wanting more, Lisa pulled away. Placing a gentle kiss on Jennie’s forehead, she murmured, “Sleep well, Jen.” Then she flounced off into the night, calling out for Rose to save her at least a bite of her macaron.

Jennie remained in the threshold for a moment longer, head spinning with thoughts of more-than-kissing Lisa goodnight. 

An image of the scrapbook Lisa’s mother had given her flashed through her mind. Pasted to one of the pages had been a picture, taken unbeknownst to them, of the pair eating lunch in a Thai shopping mall. In it, Jennie laughed while holding a fork aloft, attempting to shove a bite of pad thai into Lisa’s grinning mouth.

Below the photo, Lisa’s mom had written “Take care of my Lalisa” in neat English.

Jennie sighed. Eye fucking Lisa at every opportunity was probably not what she had meant. Pinching the bridge of her nose, Jennie groaned aloud at her inability to control her desires.

“Miss her already?” Jisoo drawled, and Jennie jumped at the sound of the older girl’s voice.

Bringing her hand up to her chest, Jennie scowled at Jisoo. “You scared me.”

“What doesn’t?” Jisoo asked dryly, turning away from the door. Jennie grumbled but followed her into the living room as Jisoo continued, “What are you sighing about this time?”

Jennie hesitated. As close as they were, she was pretty sure Jisoo didn’t need (or want) to know about all the lecherous thoughts running through her head.

“What if we get caught?” Jennie deflected, referencing what she felt was a more legitimate concern.

Jisoo snorted, flopping down onto the couch. “Less than a day in, and you’re already stressed?”

“Imagine the scandal,” Jennie pressed, her old worries resurfacing as she sat across from Jisoo. “Management is already so strict about Lisa and me being too clingy. Remember that livestream a few weeks ago?”

The livestream in question had taken place right after they’d moved into the house. Jennie had slung an arm around Lisa and, when signaled by their managers to release the younger girl, had – for reasons much clearer to her now – stubbornly refused. It had taken several nervous prompts from Jisoo, including the older girl actually reaching behind Jennie to pull her arm away, for Jennie to finally let go, rolling her eyes and dropping her hands back to her lap.

Jisoo laughed at the memory. “I mean, don’t be dumb about it. Just stay separate in public, and don’t touch each other so much. And try to be less obvious with your staring, if you can,” she teased, poking Jennie’s reddening cheek.

Swatting Jisoo’s hand away, Jennie fixed the older girl with a serious stare.

“I mean it. If people find out, we’ll lose everything.”

Jisoo sighed, moving to sit beside Jennie. “I get that it’s scary, but you can’t let fear control your life,” she said, wrapping a comforting arm around Jennie’s shoulder. “I know we’ve worked so hard to get where we are, but aren’t we supposed to be living the dream? If you can’t be happy, then what was it all for?”

“I guess–”

“That was a rhetorical question, dummy,” Jisoo cut her off. “All I’m saying is that you and Lisa, I think it’s a good thing, Jen. And you deserve that. So just focus on making it work, and don’t worry too much about the other stuff.”

Jisoo had an uncanny knack for saying the right thing, and her words soothed the doubts prickling at the back of Jennie’s mind like a balm.

“Thanks Soo,” Jennie said quietly, leaning her head against the older girl’s shoulder.

Jisoo chuckled and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. “Any other problems I can solve for you, or are you done freaking out for tonight?”

“Well, while we’re on the subject of getting caught, Lisa’s been really handsy lately,” Jennie disclosed. Ignoring the slightly nauseous expression on Jisoo’s face, she continued, “I want to take things slowly, but I mean _look at her_. I can’t stop thinking about–”

“You know what, I take it back. You can keep that part to yourself,” Jisoo broke in, clapping her hands over her ears and standing up. Heading toward their bathroom, she called over her shoulder, “I don’t really want to hear about it, and I _definitely_ don’t want to hear it, so just figure it out with Lisa and make sure you remember to close the door.”

  
Staring blankly at her clipboard, Jennie couldn’t think of a single thing she wanted to do in Thailand that wasn’t just making out with Lisa, or walking around with Lisa, or lying on the beach with Lisa, or just sitting around looking at Lisa.

Rubbing her eyes sleepily, she reached for a guidebook.

“Write what you want, but I’m only doing the ones that sound good,” Jisoo warned as Jennie watched her scrawl ‘CHICHOO’ in huge letters at the top of her page. For someone with such neat handwriting in Korean, her English penmanship was truly dismal.

Jennie peered over at Lisa, who was scanning through a massive travel pamphlet. “I want to eat breakfast first,” she whined, clearly ignoring the listed attractions as she gazed longingly at the takeout advertisements lining the sides of the brochure.

“Focus,” Jisoo admonished, snatching the leaflet from her. “What do you even need that for? Aren’t you from here?”

Lisa pouted. “I’m from Bangkok, not here,” she grumbled, but returned to her list. Eyebrows knitted in thought, she idly tapped the end of her pen against her bottom lip.

Her own list forgotten, Jennie stared openly at Lisa’s mouth.

Lisa absentmindedly bit her lip, and Jennie, feeling suddenly warm, watched the younger girl’s tongue sweep delicately over the spot. Lisa reached up to sweep a few strands of hair behind her ear with long fingers, and Jennie’s eyes followed the motion before returning to that damn pen resting between the younger girl’s lips. Jennie was ashamed to say she was jealous. Of a pen.

Suddenly, Lisa’s doe eyes swept up to meet Jennie’s, and the corner of her lips curled up into a smirk. Caught staring, Jennie flushed but held Lisa’s stare, silently begging whatever god was out there to stop testing her resolve like this.

But Lisa was a Buddhist, and Jennie’s god had no power over her.

Unable to look away, Jennie could only watch as Lisa trapped the end of the pencil between her teeth, eyes hooded with undisguised desire. Lisa knew exactly what she was doing, and Jennie found herself white-knuckled, clenching her clipboard so tightly she almost snapped it in two.

_Fucking tease_.

Divine intervention did come, a second too late, in the form of Rose slamming her palm against the knife wedged in her apple, making both Jennie and Lisa jump. When Jennie looked back at Lisa, the younger girl had already returned to her clipboard, busily writing her tour plans.

Picking up the slightly crumpled brochure Jisoo had thrust in her lap, Jennie sighed and went back to making her list.

It was going to be a long day.


	12. Worth It

Jennie was simply too pretty. That was the conclusion Lisa came to, standing next to her on the beach, the waves lapping at their feet. A warm breeze whipped through Jennie’s pigtails, and a gleeful little smile lit up the Korean girl’s face.

“Look at this,” Jennie said to Lisa, pointing downwards. While Lisa watched, she used a manicured toe to carve a little heart in the wet sand. After adding a tiny ‘L’ inside the heart, Jennie glanced back up at Lisa, beaming.

Yes, Lisa was a complete fool for this girl. Her heart thudded against her chest, and she couldn’t distinguish the sound of the crashing waves from the blood roaring in her ears. She wanted to pull Jennie close, cover her face with kisses, give her anything she asked for.

But she couldn’t. Even when Jennie flashed her that giddy, gummy smile and looked at her like no one else existed, Lisa was all too conscious of the cameras on them. Monitored as they were, she could do nothing but grin dorkily back at Jennie as the tide came in again, wiping the sand clean.

Lisa wasn’t a big worrier. She tended to act first and think second, preferring to take life as it came and not dwell on consequences. Maybe for that reason, though, the issue of getting caught impulsively doing something she shouldn’t (like tackling Jennie to the sand and kissing her silly in front of dozens of people) was beginning to weigh on her.

She tried to push the issue to the back of her mind, but her worries needled at her for the rest of their beachside stroll and throughout the water safety training. It wasn’t until she was finally out at sea, safety-trained and strapped into an offensively bright lifejacket, that she saw an opportunity to shut her thoughts off for a moment.

So, she took it. Twisting the throttle as far as it would go, Lisa felt the jet ski growl beneath her and leap forward through the waves. Within seconds, she was hurtling across the water’s surface, grinning delightedly as she gunned the jet ski to higher and higher speeds.

“Whoa, Lisa!” Jisoo called out to her, giving her a thumbs up. Lisa tossed her a peace sign in response before looping around and revving the jet ski for another run.

On her third or fourth pass along the shoreline, Lisa spotted Jennie and Rose waving at her, two white blobs against the sand. Speeding up, she caught the edge of a wave, and the jet ski lifted off the water for a brief, weightless moment. As she splashed back down, Lisa let out an elated scream, adrenaline coursing through her.

Sure, she was showing off, but when she turned to see Jennie watching her with awe, mouth agape, she felt like a fucking action movie hero.

Eventually it was Rose and Jennie’s turn, and Lisa stumbled onto the sand with wobbly legs. Flopping down into a plastic chair, she wiped saltwater off her cheeks and waited for Jisoo to join her.

Jennie took off immediately, her squeals piercing the air as she sped across the waves. “Her pigtails are being blown around,” Jisoo snickered.

“It’s cute,” Lisa said, smiling at Jennie’s exhilaration.

“Look how slow Chaeyoung is,” Jisoo added, pointing toward the girl in question, who was scudding along far behind Jennie and appeared to be holding onto the jet ski for dear life.

“Chaeyoung-ah_,_ a little faster!” Lisa yelled encouragingly. Rose turned to look at them and released a handlebar to wave, but at that moment, Jennie streaked by, causing the younger girl to shriek and cling desperately back on as Jennie’s wake rocked her jet ski precariously. Lisa and Jisoo burst out laughing, and the look of indignation Rose shot them was visible from the shore.

The rest of Rose and Jennie’s jet ski experience went pretty much the same way, with Jennie flying through the water at top speed and Rose puttering along after her, stopping every now and then to wipe sea spray from Jennie’s jet ski off her face.

When they came back in, Jennie dismounted and immediately slumped into Lisa’s waiting arms. “That was amazing,” Jennie breathed into Lisa’s shoulder, heart pounding so hard that Lisa could feel it against her chest.

Brushing a stray hair off the older girl’s cheek, Lisa chuckled fondly. “You’re not too seasick?” she asked with some concern, rubbing her hands along Jennie’s arms. Jennie just shook her head, smiling up at Lisa in a way that made her feel like she was back on the jet ski, tearing across the water at full speed with her heart in her throat.

She truly was far too pretty.

“Were you guys making fun of me the whole time?” Rose whined as she clambered off her own jet ski, breaking Lisa’s daze.

“Not the _whole_ time,” Jisoo half-reassured her, and Rose huffed in mock offense before collapsing into Lisa’s vacated seat. “Don’t worry, Lisa was barely looking at you,” Jisoo continued, shooting an insinuating glance at Lisa and Jennie, the former still grasping the latter’s shoulders.

Lisa scowled, preparing a snappy comeback, but Jennie cut in before she could respond. “Watch out, or Lisa’s going to cut the cord while you’re parasailing,” she warned, making a scissor motion with her fingers while wrapping a protective arm around Lisa’s waist.

Jisoo’s eyes widened comically, and she nudged Rose with her elbow. “Wow look, they’re already ganging up on us.”

“Us?” Rose asked, shuffling away from Jisoo, who frowned at the betrayal. “Don’t lump me in with you. You made your bed there.”

Before this could spiral any further, they were interrupted by a manager, who gestured at the waiting parasailing crew. Sighing, Jisoo grabbed Lisa by the wrist and tugged her toward the boat, muttering something about unruly children under her breath.

A short, slightly nauseating boat ride later, Lisa found herself airborne again.

Once the initial thrill of being hoisted hundreds of feet into the air had faded, she felt an unexpected quietude settle over her. To one side, hazy mountains framed white sand and tiny beachside huts. To the other, the ocean, glassy and kinetic, stretched out to meet the skyline, turquoise blurring into cerulean.

Suddenly sentimental, Lisa told the camera, “This could be embarrassing, but I’m glad we came on this first trip together. I hope we can make a lot of good memories before going back. I love you guys.”

Her message recorded, Lisa leaned back into the harness and just enjoyed the view, savoring the rare moment of solitary peace.

Another syrupy-sweet, half-finished drink in her hand, Lisa dug her toes into the cool sand and inhaled the balmy night air. Glancing to her right, she watched Jennie sip delicately from a shaved coconut. The Korean girl’s neck flexed as she swallowed, and Lisa felt her stomach clench in response.

“We can’t always go out freely like today,” Jisoo said from her left, and Lisa tore her gaze from Jennie’s throat to look at the older girl. “If we could go out like this in Korea, what would you guys want to do?”

Take Jennie on a real date, Lisa thought immediately, eyes drifting back to the cat-eyed girl. She wanted to go to a nice restaurant together, walk through a park with their fingers intertwined, be a real couple, free from the pressures of their lifestyle.

“I want to wear a bikini and ride a horse on the beach,” Jennie responded, her imagination having seemingly carried her in a very different direction than Lisa. Seeing three faces staring blankly back at her, she quickly added, “They do that a lot in foreign countries.”

As Rose and Jisoo nodded in understanding, Lisa whined, “I want to go to an amusement park. I just want to play without worrying about other people.”

At that moment, their song began blaring from the speakers, startling the four girls. Lisa promptly reached for her drink, thinking that she needed to be drunker for this. “When we hear our songs while eating out, we always ignore it,” Jisoo laughed, but her tone held a bitter edge.

As they half-heartedly danced through the song, Lisa couldn’t help but feel that the timing couldn’t have been more perfect; the song came as a rude awakening, jolting them from their fantasies of living outside the spotlight and dragging them back to reality.

For the rest of the evening, the weight of that reality settled over Lisa like a wet blanket, prompting her to keep her hands to herself, reminding her that she’d never really be able to take Jennie on that date.

Rose noticed Lisa’s unusually subdued demeanor on their walk back to the van, gently threading an arm through Lisa’s. “Everything okay?” she asked, matching her strides with Lisa’s.

“Yeah, just thinking about how we can’t really do normal things anymore,” Lisa sighed, casting a glance at Jennie and Jisoo walking ahead of them. Rose nodded understandingly, and Lisa continued, “I’m kind of worried about getting caught.”

“With Jennie?”

Lisa nodded, eyes drifting unconsciously to the camera crew following from a few paces away. “I feel like I’m going to do something stupid and everyone will find out about us and it’ll ruin everything.”

Rose frowned, and Lisa resisted the urge to pinch the older girl’s chipmunk cheeks. They were having a serious moment, she reminded herself.

Unaware of Lisa’s frivolous internal dialogue, Rose fixed her with a gentle stare. “I understand why you’re worried, but I don’t think it’s that big of a deal. I mean, people already think you’re dating, or that Jen’s dating Jisoo, or that _we’re_ dating.”

At that last part, she pulled a face, and this time, Lisa did pinch Rose’s cheek with her free hand, drawing a squeal of protest from the other girl.

“What I’m saying is,” Rose continued, batting Lisa’s fingers away from her face, “You’re so affectionate that it’s not weird for you to act kind of couple-y with Jennie. You just can’t be obviously more lovey with Jennie than with anyone else.”

Comforted by this sentiment, Lisa smiled at Rose and disentangled her arm from the older girl’s to wrap it around her shoulder instead. “So I should just be extra affectionate with you?” she teased, pulling Rose close. “Aw Chaeng, if you wanted more kisses from me you could’ve just asked, you know.”

Squirming out of Lisa’s grasp, Rose shook her head vehemently. “Don’t you dare, Lalisa,” she warned, looking nervously at the older girls ahead of them. “I do _not_ want to be on the receiving end of Jennie’s jealousy.”

Lisa laughed, raising her hands in surrender. She returned her arm to its previous position, loosely twined with Rose’s at their sides, and the pair continued walking, a comfortable silence settling between them.

She remembered the first time she met Rose, nearly six years ago. Lisa had been a trainee for over a year already, but she had just started to adjust to the language and the rigorous lifestyle.

Then one day, she had bumped into a new girl in the company elevator, another foreigner, not by blood but by nationality. The new girl had seemed just as unfamiliar with Korea, just as uncomfortable speaking Korean, and just as out of place in the new environment as Lisa had been. Despite those similar barriers, this new girl had exuded a kind of quiet confidence, with her guitar slung over her back and her accent curling around her words, and Lisa would be lying if she said she hadn’t been a little intimidated by her.

But Rose had immediately struck up a conversation with Lisa, turning out to be easygoing and friendly and not at all put off by Lisa’s evident struggles with Korean, and the two had just clicked. They had become fast friends, swapping stories of times they mispronounced restaurant orders, missed subway stops, missed home so much they couldn’t bear it.

Lisa wasn’t certain if she would be where she was now, debuted and strolling on the Thai beach as a tourist, if it weren’t for Rose, reassuring her when she made mistakes and picking her up when she fell.

“Thanks for being my best friend,” she said quietly when they arrived at the van, catching Rose off guard with the sudden expression of gratitude.

Turning to the younger girl, Rose’s eyes softened, and she patted Lisa’s arm affectionately. “Always here for you,” she responded as she released Lisa’s arm to step into the van. Then, as an afterthought, she jokingly added, “You could stand to be a little nicer to me though.”

Lisa laughed and piled into the van after Rose, gently brushing her fingers across Jennie’s shoulder before sliding into the backseat. Jennie turned to look questioningly back at her, but Lisa just shot her a playful wink, causing the older girl to flush and pivot forward again.

For the entire duration of the ride back to their hotel, Lisa remained perched on the edge of her seat, leaning forward to play with Jennie’s hair. Running her fingers through the smooth, dark strands, Lisa half-listened to Rose talk about her plans for the next day while thoughts of other, more… _salacious_ ways to make Jennie blush clouded her mind.

When they arrived at their hotel, Lisa caught up to the older girls, skimming her hand down Jennie’s bare arm to tangle their fingers together. She didn’t miss the goosebumps that broke out along the Korean girl’s skin, nor the way Jennie shivered at the contact.

Neither did Jisoo, looking at the pair with a combination of amusement and revulsion. Catching sight of something in Lisa’s eyes – probably the overt lust she was making no effort to hide – Jisoo coughed and swiftly turned to Rose, muttering something about seeing if the water pressure was better in the younger girls’ suite before practically dragging the Australian girl away and down the hill.

“Did you want something?” Jennie asked innocently as she let them into her suite, but her voice wavered slightly, and a sly grin spread across Lisa’s face.

As soon as the door shut behind them, Lisa swiveled and shoved Jennie against it, leaning in to claim the older girl’s lips. Jennie’s noise of surprise at the sudden assail quickly morphed into a moan as Lisa’s lips moved against hers, and the older girl brought a hand up to grasp at the back of Lisa’s neck.

Drawing away for a moment, Lisa breathlessly murmured, “I’ve been wanting to do that all day.”

In lieu of a response, Jennie just pulled her in again, her other hand sneaking inside Lisa’s baggy Hawaiian shirt to trail down the younger girl’s side as she brought their mouths together. Sparks erupted along Lisa’s skin at the contact, and she moaned into Jennie’s mouth, causing the older girl’s lips to curve up against Lisa’s.

Pulling her hands from where they had been planted against the door, Lisa shrugged out of her shirt and moved to wrap her arms around Jennie’s waist, but the shorter girl surged forward, pushing them further into the darkened suite, lips locked the entire time.

Lisa stumbled backward, her mind foggy with want, until the backs of her legs hit something solid, at which point Jennie finally broke their kiss to shove Lisa, wide-eyed and panting, down onto the couch.

Jennie quickly pulled her dress up over her head, carelessly flinging it off to the side, and Lisa barely had time to process seeing so much of Jennie’s soft, creamy skin (holy _shit_ was Jennie beautiful), before Jennie was on her again, straddling the younger girl on the couch and crashing their lips back together.

Lisa grasped Jennie’s waist, running her hands across smooth skin, then unintentionally dragging her nails along Jennie’s back as the older girl’s tongue slid against hers. Jennie hissed at the pain, and Lisa drew back for a moment, an apology on her lips, but Jennie swallowed Lisa’s words as she dove back down, hungrily reclaiming her mouth and pinning Lisa against the couch.

Moving from Lisa’s lips up to her ear, Jennie huskily whispered, “I liked it,” before tugging at Lisa’s earlobe with sharp teeth.

And fuck, did Lisa like that.

She gasped and bucked her hips slightly, seeking some kind of friction to alleviate the heat coiled in the pit of her stomach, but to no avail.

Jennie chuckled, low and throaty, only fanning the flame of Lisa’s desire, then trailed her lips down Lisa’s neck to suck gently at the younger girl’s pulse point. Lisa groaned and threw her head back, and Jennie took advantage of the increased access to work her way down the column of Lisa’s throat, leaving delicate little bites along the way.

Jennie’s skin was so soft under her fingers, and she smelled so good, and the tiny, breathy noises she was making sent shivers down Lisa’s spine. Not to mention the things she was doing with her _mouth_ – if Jennie kept nipping at that one spot on her neck like that, Lisa was certain she was going to explode unless she did something to alleviate the pressure building in her body soon.

She brought a hand up to tangle in Jennie’s hair and dragged the older girl’s face up to meet hers again, giving her a bruising kiss. Releasing Jennie’s head to slide her hands down the Korean girl’s toned body, Lisa gripped Jennie’s ass and rutted her hips up, pressing her clothed pelvis up against the other girl’s barely-clothed center.

At that, Jennie let out a high-pitched moan that went straight to Lisa’s core, spurring her to repeat the action, but Jennie suddenly broke away, tearing her lips from Lisa’s and sitting up rapidly.

“Lili wait,” Jennie breathed, chest heaving and cheeks pink.

Lisa froze, wondering if she did something wrong, but Jennie was quick to reassure her, leaning back to drop a gentle kiss against Lisa’s lips before sitting up again. She carded her fingers through her hair and reached down to hold Lisa’s hands in her own.

“You’re amazing, and that… well _fuck_, that was amazing,” Jennie murmured, rubbing her thumbs along the backs of Lisa’s hands. “I just think that if we keep going, I won't be able to stop myself, and I don’t want to push you too far too soon.”

She was looking down at Lisa with such fondness in her eyes and a soft, almost shy smile (which Lisa found kind of funny because about a minute ago Jennie had been anything but shy), and in spite of how stunned she was by the abrupt shift, Lisa felt warmth bloom in her chest at the perfect girl sitting astride her.

Jennie was right. Even if she wanted to give herself to Jennie, Lisa wasn’t sure if she was ready for everything yet since she’d never done any of this before. And here was Jennie, looking at her like she was some kind of precious flower and telling her that she’d wait until Lisa felt comfortable.

Overwhelmed with affection, Lisa felt tears prick at her eyes, and she wrapped her arms around the older girl’s waist to pull her into her chest, shifting so they were lying against each other on the couch.

Pressing a kiss to Jennie’s forehead, Lisa mumbled a quiet ‘thank you’ into the Korean girl’s hair. Jennie just hummed against her, tucking her head into the crook of Lisa’s neck as Lisa rubbed soft circles into her back. Lisa was so grateful for Jennie, to Jennie, and she silently wondered how many orphanages she’d built in a past life to deserve someone like her.

Eventually, Lisa would have to get up and trek back to her own suite, but for now, she was content to spend a few more moments here with Jennie. The lifestyle they led, the media attention, the hard work – it was all worth it because at the end of the day, it brought her to Jennie, and Lisa wouldn’t trade that for anything.


End file.
